With the greatest possible respect...

Home Improvement

2010-09-11T03:17:00.004-05:00

Imagine moving every single thing from a 1000 sq foot apartment into an already furnished 900 sq foot apartment. That's exactly what happened when Anu's things arrived a couple of weeks ago. I've always wondered what it would be like to live in an RV for an extended period. Well, now I have some idea...

We've spent the last few days throwing out stuff. Every item, however small was scrutinized and given away or disposed of if it did not meet the bar. Multiple trips to Ikea were made to purchase various storage solutions that we so desperately needed. Our perseverance paid off. After two long weeks the house finally looks presentable.

On the work front, things have been getting busier as we sink our teeth into features for the next product cycle - SQL Server 2011. With multiple deadlines in October and November, it looks like we are in for a hard slog before the holiday season.

Road Trip!

2010-08-17T22:44:00.001-05:00

Just got back from a cross-country road trip from Boston to Seattle. My girlfriend was relocating to the Seattle area and we decided to drive! It turned out to be a great decision. We got to visit Chicago, Badlands National Park, Mount Rushmore, Crazy Horse, Devil's Tower, Big Horn National Forest, Yellowstone National Park and Glacier National Park on the way. It was an amazing experience.

Yellowstone was obviously the highlight of the trip. It is a stunningly diverse park with something for everyone - Geysers, hot springs, wildlife, rock formations, lakes, mountains. We were only able to spend a day and a half in the area but were still lucky enough to spot huge herds of bison, a grizzly bear and mountain goats.

Glacier National Park was all about the aptly named "Going to the Sun" road with very scenic mountain views for the entire 50 mile stretch. We traversed the road both ways since the views can differ dramatically.

I've added a few pictures from the trip below. (Not too many for fear of boring my limited audience. :-) ).Talking of pictures, I'm still kicking myself for not getting a camera with a more powerful zoom (Ours was a supbar 3X) before setting out on this trip. For everyone wanting to photograph wildlife, I would strongly recommend a camera with atleast a 10x zoom.

I've now visited 31 states in the US! Here's to 50 in the next 3 years. :-)

Old Faithful erupting

Grand Canyon of Yellowstone

Yellowstone Lake

Lake Sylvan

Middle Geyser Basin, Yellowstone

Grizzly Bear

Bison

Mountain Goats

Mount Rushmore

Hurricane Ridge

2010-07-18T23:48:00.002-05:00

I just got started with customizing the new base template. Check out the Bing search box on the top right and the second sidebar on the left.

Yesterday, a few friends and I drove up to Hurricane Ridge in Olympic National Park. We ended up having to wait for a couple of hours for a ferry. I was a little puzzled at first because I had made the same trip with my girlfriend last year in the middle of July (Yes, that was a Saturday too) and there was no rush. Then realization struck. It must be the improving economy I figured. :-)

The view from the top of Hurricane ridge was worth the long wait though. I enjoyed the scenery and the hike just as much as I did the first time. If I had to pick one picture to describe yesterday's trip, it would be this:

A New Beginning..

2010-07-04T18:18:00.008-05:00

The fourth of July brings me back to this blog. Why? Because I was suddenly reminded of the fact that I started this blog on July 4th 2005. It has been five 'short' years and I'm back for a fresh start. Going through my older posts, I marvel at how much I've grown up during this period. Let's see what the 2010 - 2015 period has in store for this blog. (Hopefully, more posts than the 45 I managed over the last five years.. :-)..)

Work has been going really well. We shipped PowerPivot in the middle of May. In a nutshell, PowerPivot is a self-service Business Intelligence tool that helps excel users analyze very large(or small) data sets and allows them to create amazing visual reports based on their analysis.

Now that we've shipped, I've been able to take a break and recharge while we plan for the next release. Visited India last month and had a great time meeting family and friends.

This has been a nice and relaxing weekend so far. Played some tennis, watched the Wimbledon finals, did a little cooking, caught up with a few friends over the phone.. and signed up for Twitter! ( ID: leoncyril )

Happy Fourth of July! God bless America.. and India.. and every other country in the world. :-)

PS: Please bear with the new template for now. I know my previous customized template was far better, but I had to upgrade to be able to use some features offered by Blogger. Will get around to customizing the new one shortly.

Photosynth rocks!

2009-05-18T02:30:00.004-05:00

Ever since Photosynth was released to the public in the second half of 2008, I have been wanting to try this out. A trip to St. Louis while visiting my sister for Easter gave me a chance to create a memorable synth of the city from the top of the Gateway Arch.

Check it out! Select 'View synth in Direct3D viewer' for the best experience.

Unfortunately, I was unable to create a synth of the Gateway Arch itself. It was too huge and I simply did not have the equipment to do justice to this magnificent piece of architecture.

Hopefully, this is the first of many synths that I will share on this blog.

India - Dec 2008

2009-01-24T21:19:00.014-05:00

I recently returned from a trip to India. Some random musings:

- The new airport at Hyderabad was impressive.

- I would trade all the 'Starbucks' and 'Dunkin Donuts' in the world to have a 'Coffee Day' in Seattle.

- I'm driving slower with each passing year. (Much to the relief of my passengers)

- I walked into a bank and watched helplessly while 10 people pushed past me to get ahead in the line. I seem to have lost my ability to push back.

- Each time I walked out of an Indo-Chinese restaurant, I contemplated quitting my job and settling down in India.

- Trains now have power outlets for Laptops. suddenly I prefer a train to long flights. :-)

- Kerala has more water than land.

- I'm convinced that Kanyakumari is the windiest city in the World. (Yes, even windier than Chicago)

- The highlight of the vacation was a day on board a Houseboat. It was thoroughly relaxing and refreshing.

- Beggars make me more uncomfortable with each passing year. I even cited this as a reason for taking a flight instead of the train. My point being: Why feel bad when you can't do anything about it. My Dad's response: The more you are in touch with reality, the more likely it is that you will do something about it someday when and if you can. Can't say I disagree with that.

- It was great to spend Christmas at Home after three years!

- Nothing beats meeting up with very close friends you haven't seen in a while.

- Discovered that all the 'Ready to eat' foods I brought back with me should actually be called 'Ready to throw'.

Happy New Year!

A Formal World

2008-08-16T19:18:00.004-05:00

The modern day definition of a smile seems to be: " Stretch your lips in each direction until your two front teeth are visible. Hold for one second. Bring lips back to original position.".. An alternate definition (Presumably for people who are too lazy to visit their dentist) would be: "Stretch your lips to the maximum extent possible without having to open your mouth. Hold for one second. Bring lips back to original position." The other day, a flight attendant 'smiled' at me.. and that put paid to any hopes I had of catching some sleep on the flight. I knew I would only have nightmares of vampires.

There's also this habit we have of saying 'Hi' to all and sundry. I don't know about you but it puts immense pressure on me. I live with the constant fear that I would forget to wish somebody and that they would then pierce pins into a voodoo doll to exact revenge. It also makes me wonder if I did something wrong when somebody else forgets to wish me. "Hmm.. did I forget to acknowledge their contribution at the team meeting? Did I forget to ask how their vacation was?" And in the process promptly forget to wish the next person passing me.

Moving on to a question that really throws me: 'How are you?'.. It has taken a while to realise that people are not really interested in hearing about my recent visit to the doctor or about my fantastic road trip when they direct this question at me. My initial ' Hey, you asked for it, so take it ' response has now been adapted to the universally accepted 'good/fine' response. But is any other answer even a possibility? Would someone who just returned from a wonderful vacation answer the question any differently from someone who has been sick the whole week or even a person who has just been diagonised with a terminal disease? Probably not.

It is only right to place 'Thank You' at the end. No points for guessing why.. Every trivial action must end with 'Thank You'. This rule is consistent enough to become Newton's fourth law. I wonder if we realise that when we thank someone for getting out of our way, we are actually thanking them for not colliding with us! which they would not want to do anyway, at least not unless we were Aishwarya Rai (I would prefer Kajol myself, but I'm vastly outnumbered here) or Brad Pitt.

Nothing emphasizes my point more than an email exchange:

A to B:

Hi B,

I have a question. Thanks in advance for (......).

(.. Question here ..)

Thanks again.

Thanks,
A.

B replies:

Hi A,

Thanks for asking me this question.

(.. answer ..)

Thanks,
B

("Thanks in advance" is actually a cool trick.. After all, once you have been 'thanked' for something, you HAVE to get it done. :-))

All jokes aside, it seems to me that the more civilized we become, the more formal we get. (Which explains why the United States is a far more formal society than India.) Somehow as we progress towards becoming a tolerant society, we seem to need reassurances in the form of 'wishes' and 'thanks'. But when this is overdone it leaves a sour taste in the mouth.

No, I'm not dead..

2008-07-20T23:09:00.002-05:00

..But I HAVE broken the record for the 'longest time between posts' since I started blogging in July 2005. One year and five months!!

Lots of things have changed since then. But a couple of these changes make the others pale into insignificance.

1.) I now work for Microsoft.
2.) I now live in Seattle.

Yup, I've moved all the way across the country to work for Microsoft.

A few things I like about living in Seattle:

- Redmond (Microsoft's Headquarters) is a beautiful place that resembles a vast college campus.

- There are tons of places to see and things to do within a 50 mile radius of Seattle.

A few things I don't like:

- The rain..

- Living three time zones away from most of my friends.

- And did I mention the rain?

Let me sign off now with a promise to the readers (if any) of this blog. The 'longest time between posts' record set by this post will never be broken again until at least 2014. Why 2014? That's until when Microsoft has committed to support XP. I'm kidding of course..

Seriously: However busy things get, I should still be able to post more often than I have.. and I will!

Sad but true.. :-(

2007-02-09T14:02:00.000-05:00

India the Superpower?

PS: Reflects the sentiments I expressed in my Jan 15th post with a lot more facts and statistics..

Zapped!!!

2007-01-18T17:02:00.000-05:00

In winter, getting out of my car invariably involves the following steps:

Remove the seatbelt.
Open the door.
Slide out of the seat.
Reach for the door handle.
JUMP.
CURSE.
Slam the door.

Now, being a dignified man, I would like to avoid steps 5 and 6 if I could. But it just doesn't seem possible. In fact, if you could put together all the jumps I make during any given month in winter, you could construct a dance for a very lengthy musical. A clumsy dance maybe, but nevertheless, a dance. And if you put together all the curses, you would have the lyrics for the musical, although it would probably have to be 'R' rated.

I can handle the freezing temperatures that winter brings. I don't mind the skidding and sliding in the snow and ice. I can put up with having to scrape ice off my car's windshield every morning. But static electricity irritates the hell out of me.

The first month of winter goes by with me getting shocks without expecting it. By the start of the second month I am terrified of touching almost ANYTHING. I stop and think before touching my refrigerator, table or doorknob. This is one instance where the thinking DOES NOT help at all. My thought process is along the following lines.. "Oh my god.. I'm going to get a nasty shock now. Maybe holding the door knob at this angle will help. Or perhaps acting very fast will help. Oh.. come on.. this time you may not even get a shock.." My hand reaches out and [zzzaaaappp].. Again!!!

The first month of spring is the worst. Temperatures have become warmer and humidity has improved. But I'm still apprehensive. I make all my 'touching' moves cautiously, flinching when I touch metal and.. NOTHING happens! Though I don't get zapped, I still feel like a fool.

In a departure from my usual style of rambling on about problems, I have actually looked up the solution to this one - A lucky break for the very limited number of readers out there and probably their first justification for reading this blog. The solutions here refer to getting out of your car safely, but you can always apply them to other equally dangerous objects.

Solution 1:
Hold onto some metal portion of the car before you get out and keep holding on during the entire time you are sliding out of your seat.

Solution 2:
If you are like me, you have probably forgotten to use solution 1 and are outside the car shivering in the cold and shivering more at the thought of having to shut the door. Never fear! Touch the glass portion of the car before you touch metal.

Solution 3: (Not for the faint hearted)
Use your key to touch the metal first. This is the option to go for if you like fireworks. You can almost always see a spark when the key touches metal.

If none of the three solutions work for you please sue http://www.static-sol.com/ and send me 20 % of the settlement.

I'm generous, ain't I?

The World may be flat, but India is not..

2007-01-15T23:11:00.000-05:00

In fact India is far from flat. She is a region of some of the most uneven terrain on this planet. A few high peaks scattered across low lying valleys.. You could stand on some of these peaks(Mumbai, Bangalore, Hyderabad for eg.), look down into the nearby valleys and see nothing at all - except for a dark abyss. Other peaks and life in these peaks are all that are visible, so much so that life in these few regions is portrayed as typical of the nation, when in reality, it is not.

It is very easy to fall into the trap of thinking of India in terms of these ultra-modern metropolitan cities. The other day, an american collegue and I were talking casually during a training session and he happened to mention that he would like to make a trip to visit India. My instinctive response was a boast "Oh.. you should.. India is very developed now.. You would have an amazing time.. Be sure to visit Bangalore, Hyderabad.." He interrupted me gently: "No.. No.. I want to see INDIA, not America in India." I stopped short, surprised. But the next thing he said blew me away.. He asks.. "Is most of India like Bangalore and Hyderabad now?" After I recovered, I said "No, not at all, most regions are still just India". But it took a foreigner to remind me of that fact.

At a global level, technology may have enabled nations to collaborate on a greater scale than ever before and overall the world may be 'flatter' than it has been in the past, but India has a long way to go.

Now, even I'm not naive enough to think that a nation of 1 billion could develop at a uniform pace and empower all her citizens simultaneously, but I do think that the current economic situation raises a few questions.. Does the 'empowerment' of a few have detrimental effects on the people who have not been 'empowered' yet? Will the underdeveloped be hindered when they try to take advantage of the technological advances we have made in recent years? These questions, though globally applicable are especially relevant to our country because of the huge economic and social disparity that is prevalent. One could just as easily use modern-day technology to push others down as they could to pull themselves up..

India has a notorious history of exploitation of the poor by the rich and it is imperative that this does not happen in the Information age if India is to sustain her formidable growth rates.

Moving on..

2006-11-13T21:52:00.000-05:00

I've graduated.. So.. Now what?

So now, I work for EMC Corporation. (For the uninitiated, EMC, a Massachussets based company, is the world leader in Information Infrastructure)

It has been close to three months now.. I have been settling down nicely at work (or so I think) and I hope to blog once in a while about random topics.

Now, I might talk about the storage industry, or the weather, or space, or sports, or movies, or music, or philosophy, or "how-dumb-is-that?", or "Wow-check-that-out" or "That-is-sooo-cool"... basically anything under the sun. However, please note that all opinions/'facts'/suggestions/criticism are mine and do NOT reflect the views of EMC in any way/form.

This disclaimer is probably totally unnecessary, for it would take a person with an incredibly low IQ to think that I, a lowly software engineer might represent the views of a mighty 11 billion dollar company. But I do not wish to be sued or fired. (Btw, for the record, it would take someone with a considerably lower IQ than an 'incredibly low IQ' to sue ME..)

So how have the first few days of professional life been?

In one word.. GREAT!!! In a bigger word.. WONDERFUL!!!

Some random facts about my first three months here..

- All new hires at EMC have a mentor assigned to them, to help them familiarize themselves with the environment and to basically help them settle down. "What question is this damned guy going to ask me now?" is probably the first thought that comes into my mentor's head when he sights me for the first time on any given day. :D.. (Of course I'm only kidding.. If I dared to make the statement 'I have been settling down nicely at work'.. it's only because he was around to help.. But I do ask more questions than a normal guy would.. (sheepish))

- If you count the number of cups of coffee I've had.. well.. let's just say you'd still be counting. If you're still wondering... Of course, it's free.. We have five varieties, but I only like one.

- Coming to furniture, I have a huge desk, a large white board and two chairs with one of them being comfy enough to curl up and have an afternoon nap.

- Getting yourself to work between 8 and 10 am can be a difficult task especially if you're the kind who asks only one question during a discussion at school about what class to take... i.e. Does it meet in the afternoons? This is probably the only area in which school scores over work.

- Where does work score over school? Well for starters.. there's the money.. secondly.. there's the money again.. thirdly.. there's the money factor once more.. ;-)

Signing off.. Please remember..

In this blog it's just going be ME talking off the top of my hat.. No EMC.

Leon Nirmal Cyril B.Tech, MS.. :-)

2006-05-25T20:15:00.000-05:00

I've graduated!!!!

Non-Proliferation Treaty or NonPerformance Treaty?

2006-04-18T20:34:00.000-05:00

*Disclaimer*
All views expressed in this post are those of the author. The author is only excercising his right of speech. This is not an attempt to defame/belittle countries/people. And err.. (in case there is any doubt).. by author, I mean... ME. You are most welcome to point out any flaws in my thinking. But I only ask that you do it politely. Thank you.

I was having breakfast at the dining hall last week when something on television caught my interest. There was talk of Iran's Uranium enrichment plan and how they were going against the International Community by manufacturing pure Uranium that could be used(hypothetically) to produce nuclear weapons. This TV news snippet brought back memories of a conversation I had with my Dad when I was in seventh grade.

Me: Dad, what is NPT?.. It's all over the papers, magazines and there was even a question on a quiz in school about it.

Dad: NPT stands for Non-proliferation treaty.. (sarcastically) You would know that yourself if you do not restrict yourself to only the sports page.

Me(spare the lecture look): Ok..Ok.. but what does the treaty say?

Dad: Basically the US wants India to keep away from nuclear arms research/development and testing.

Me: But America has nuclear arms!!!!?

Dad: Yes they do....

The rest of the conversation is immaterial. Though this exchange occurred ages ago, I still remember thinking of the absurdity of a nation in possession of nuclear arms trying to convince a second nation not to indulge in producing nuclear weapons. I just assumed I was too young to understand all the issues involved and promptly forgot all about it.

However, the whole concept of NPT sounds just as absurd to me today. Imagine a few select countries (United States, Russia, United Kingdom, France and China) the so called "Nuclear weapon states" (NWS) using a possible nuclear catastrophe as a ploy to demand that all other nations do not possess or develop nuclear weapons of their own.

The fact that 183 countries have signed the treaty makes it downright weird. You would think that they would have at the very least, demanded some actual disarmament from the NWS, before becoming a party to the treaty. Though it has been close to 50 years since the treaty came into being, there has been no serious disarmament activity from the NWS.

And what is more.. There has been talk of America imposing possible sanctions on Iran for breaching the treaty. They could have just said..

"We don't want nuclear weapon development in the middle east, which is brimming with terrorists, and risk nuclear weapons falling into the wrong hands only to be used against us. So, as the most powerful country in the world, we are going to throw our weight around and ensure that Iran does not produce enriched uranium that may be used for nuclear weapon development."

But to say....

"You are not sticking to the treaty".

"You are endangering the International Community"

...after openly disobeying/ignoring Article VI of the NPT which essentially calls for progressive disarmament from the United States and the other NWS, is a parody of sorts.

Today, the five 'PERMANENT' members of the security council come together in Moscow to discuss sanctions proposed by the United States, to deter Iran from continuing their enrichment process. Please note that these are the only countries in the world that are 'ALLOWED' to possess nuclear weapons according to the 'NON-PROLIFERATION TREATY".

If the United Nations has the power to recommend economic sanctions on the nations that fail to adhere to the NPT, then why haven't any sanctions been imposed on the Nuclear Weapon States('the PERMANENT members') who have so cunningly postponed any actual disarmament for over 10 years now. And would those sanctions help? Would sanctions on the most powerful nations in the world affect them significantly enough? Probably not.

This post is NOT a call for all nations of the world to start nuclear arms production. It is just a call for nations to withdraw from the NPT which has failed miserably to bring about disarmament, the sole aim behind the treaty. (Not that I expect any country presidents to read this.. Just attribute this sentence to one of my fits of megalomania.. ).

For the NPT (or any other disarmament treaty for that matter) to be successful, we need to start with the Nuclear weapon states. Not the rest of the world EXCEPT the NWS. In simple terms, the problem here is nuclear weapons and obviously the best way to solve a problem is the source of the problem, namely the NWS. What is the point in getting a treaty signed by every single country that does NOT possess a nuclear weapon if the ultimate goal is the complete elimination of nuclear weapons from the face of the Earth?

If the NWS and other nuclear states(Israel and India) want to pursue disarmament with honorable intentions, they must realize that they will have to start with themselves. They brought this menace into the world and it is they who must take the responsibility of getting rid of the menace. Not by threatening/browbeating other nations into not producing nuclear weapons but by approaching the non-trivial problem of 'disarming' themselves seriously and taking concrete steps that would make the goal of 'disarmament' achievable in real-time.

For more on Nuclear Disarmament click here.

Today happens to be my Dad's birthday.. Well Dad.. Think of this post as an elaborate means of letting you know that I'm in touch with world affairs.. ;-) Happy Birthday!! I love you!

Rang De Basanti - A few reflections

2006-03-04T20:30:00.000-05:00

*Disclaimer*
It has been more than a month since Rang De Basanti has hit the screens and I assumed (wrongly as the first comment indicates) that this disclaimer was unnecessary. So here goes.. Those of you who haven't seen the movie yet, please be forewarned that this post, though not a review of the movie, does contain some spoilers.

Without doubt Rang De Basanti is a pleasant watch. There are a lot of fun-filled moments interspersed with some absorbing and thought-provoking ones. Since we went in a gang of 14 to watch the movie, I didn't get much of a chance to reflect after the movie ended. The other day however, I was listening to the 'Rang de basanti' soundtrack and it triggered a few reflections that I would like to share.

In the recent past and the not so recent past, several movies, the most prominent of which are "Gentleman", "Indian" (Hindusthani), "Mudhalvan", "Ramana" and "Anniyan" portray violence of some sort as a means of doing away with corruption. Not just violence but 'Glamorous violence' in which 'heroes' accept credit for gruesome killings as if they were being offered the bharat ratna award. While this glorified violence is stylish to watch, does it make any sense?

Rang De Basanti draws a parallel between pre-independence revolutionaries who sacrificed their lives in the freedom struggle and five youngsters who fight corruption after experiencing a mental awakening brought about by the untimely demise of a good friend. In the movie, five perfectly normal college students turn killers, which of course means that they weren't normal in the first place. It takes a lot for a stable human being to turn into a killer. A LOT.

If the movie makers are suggesting that we follow in the footsteps of the revolutionaries in our fight against corruption, they're wrong. In fact history suggests otherwise. It is common knowledge that our Independence was won through the non-violent MASS MOVEMENT rather than the scattered bursts of attacks by the revolutionaries. Keeping this in mind, the protest that Ajay Rathod's mother leads makes much more sense than the assassination of the Defense minister. The resulting lathi charge (I doubt if it would have happened in real life) would have made big headlines and garnered sympathy from all sections of society.

Anyways, coming to the issue of corruption itself..

So long as there is evil in the world (And I believe this will always be the case) corruption will exist in some form or the other. The question that begs to be answered is.. Why is corruption prevalent to such a large degree in our country?

Personally, I feel that a lack of deterrent is the main reason for this all-pervasive corruption in India. If people are caught for a misdemeanor they would much rather pay 50 Rupees to a policeman than 500 Rupees to the government. What do they care about where the money goes? Ditto for the policeman who would rather take 50 Rupees from the law-breaker than write out a ticket that would ensure that the 500 Rupees reaches the government. This is where the deterrent comes in. If the cost of 'attempting to bribe' is very high.. MUCH HIGHER than the 450 Rs that might be saved, most people wouldn't attempt to bribe. Obviously I wouldn't try to bribe customs if I KNOW that the minimum penalty would be a term in jail. Also, the bribe taker would think twice if his pension or job were at stake. With high cost deterrents in place the briber and the bribe seeker would be shit scared of each other even assuming the absence of all other witnesses.

I do believe we are making progress, albeit slowly. For instance when I turned 18, I wanted a driving license. Only, it was inconvenient for me to take the driving test because I was studying in Chennai at the time. Paying a few hundred bucks to a driving school did the trick. Note that I hadn't taken a single class from the driving school. The license arrived in my absence and my Dad signed for it! However, the very next year when my sister needed a license, even the driving school from which she had taken lessons for months could not get her a license without her taking both the written and driving exam. The cost of issuing a license without a record of an exam has gone up. Deterrents have been put in place.

I'm confident corruption will decrease gradually. Only, given the extreme differences between the rich and the poor and the high illiteracy levels in our country, it is going to be an agonizingly slow process. I don't see any shortcuts.. :-(. No amount of killing (glamorous or otherwise) is going to help.

If you ask me, Rang De Basanti may have been entertaining, may have resulted in an adrenaline rush and may have had some touching moments. But does it pass on a meaningful message for the general public? NO. Period.

*Today happens to be the birthday of a very close friend of mine..
Happy Birthday Murali!!! Thanks for all those great times we had*

The Jupiter String Quartet Concert

2006-02-20T00:03:00.000-05:00

I am about as far from being a musical instrument enthusiast as Proxima Centauri is from the earth. In fact banging my big toe against the leg of a piano (and almost fracturing it in the process) has been my most intimate encounter with an instrument of any kind. By a quirk of fate, a professor of a friend of mine living in Babcock (Let's call her M) gave her two tickets to a string quartet concert. Note that she wasn't any great fan of musical instruments either. Since the tickets were 27 bucks apiece and both of us are not the type to spend that kind of money on concerts, we thought we would make best use of this opportunity.

We find our way to the Theatre and to our delight our seats were front-row center stage seats. Congratulating myself for having brought my camera along I think I'm going to get some great pictures. The stage was set up and the program was about to start. After looking all around and seeing that no one had bought a camera along, I very hesitantly took a picture of the stage after turning the flash off. That was the only picture I got that night, because the very next minute an announcement was made about "photography of any kind" being prohibited.

I was initially worried about displaying my abysmal ignorance of music to M but much to my delight I found that I might even be considered a musical maestro when compared to her. The names 'Mozart' and 'Beethoven' on the agenda did not strike a chord in her head. Not even after I hinted 'Moonlight Sonata'. Chuckling in glee I relaxed while she looked at me with great respect not knowing how little I knew myself.

The artistes walk in and there is a pin-drop silence. The kind of silence that produces a dull ringing noise in your ears. It was hard to believe that a crowd of several hundred could be that silent. After a bow, the artistes take their respective seats and begin the first piece. It was a Mozart composition. After concentrating intensely for 20 minutes, I find my eyes begin to close. But I control myself. "Nirmal", I tell myself.. "this is going to be your first and last concert. Enjoy it to the fullest." All of a sudden, everyone in the audience started clapping and that was when we realized that the piece had ended. The second piece by one Frenchman "Henri Dutilleux" was a little better in that it didn't put me to sleep. But perhaps that was because I had stopped focussing on the music itself and had immersed myself in observing the movements and funny expressions made by the artistes.

Strangely, unlike Hollywood movies, this concert had an intermission. We do not know what the elite audience discussed about the performance of the artistes during the break but some excerpts of the conversation between M and me follow:

M: So.. what did you think?
Me: Hmm.. It was a different experience.. I kinda dozed off for a few minutes during the first piece though. Did you like it?
M: Oh.. yeah.. It was interesting.. Did you notice the strange facial expressions the artistes were making.
Me: Yeah.. I could hardly prevent myself from laughing. I got used to it after some time though. M(pssst): The guy in the middle was cute na..
Me(sarcastically): Oh really..
M: Yes.. And I liked the way he made way for the girl before leaving.
Me: I would do that too..
M: hehe haha.. hoo hoo..
Me (ominously): Are you saying I wouldn't?
M: Well.. let's put it this way.. I would have believed you if you hadn't let the door bang into my face on our way in.
Me (sheepishly): Oh that.. it was a genuine mistake.. I forgot you were coming in after me.
M (sarcastically): Well given the fact that I didn't go ahead of you and the fact that we came together I must have been behind you right?
Me (grumbling): Well.. I must've been thinking of something else.. Never mind.. Did you notice the girl at the extreme right?
M (suspiciously): Yes.. she was cute.. and her dress was awesome too.. what about her?
Me (softly): Did you notice how her calf muscles moved while she was playing?
M: No.. I had better things to do..
Me: Like watch the guy in the center I presume.
M (haughtily) : Exactly..

... and so the conversation went.. Not exactly a discussion of the remarkable performance we had just witnessed. The intermission was longer than we expected and we cracked jokes in Hindi about the artistes having dinner.

Soon afterwards the troupe entered and began playing the last piece of the day. It was a piece by 'Beethoven' and having read some very inspiring anecdotes about him, I resolved to listen carefully to this final composition. In fact I sshhhhhed 'M' and said very importantly "Beethoven", "Beethoven" like he was my good old friend. Luckily for me the composition was truly wonderful. Something that even amateurs could enjoy. The climax of the piece was especially breathtaking with the artistes reaching a crescendo of sorts.

All in all a memorable evening...

My vacation

2006-02-12T14:09:00.000-05:00

Now that I am done with cribbing, let us move on to happier things. This past winter break was one of the most pleasant vacations I have ever had. Loads of travelling, loads of good food, loads of shopping, loads of movies, loads of get-togethers. In fact the only thing missing in that list is probably 'loads of sleeping' but then one can't get loads of everything and still get the sleep one wants... ;-). I wonder why my sis finds this so hard to understand.. grr.

Some pictures follow..

I took this picture of Downtown Washington DC standing right in the middle of the road after the pedestrian signal had changed. Luckily, I wasn't arrested.. I was honked at a couple of times though..

The Capitol Building

The White House was the least impressive of all the architecture in DC. I wasn't even tempted to take a peek inside though they were allowing visitors on the day we were there.

The Lincoln Memorial

The Washington Monument

Both the Lincoln Memorial and the Washinton monument were breathtakingly beautiful.

Blog updates

2006-02-03T12:36:00.000-05:00

1) Atleast for this semester this blog will be more of a tool to keep in touch with friends than to entertain readers. I guess I am chasing away readers by saying this but it can't be helped. For now it will have to be this or nothing.

2) In case you haven't noticed, the christmas tree has been edited out of the background image to improve readability. Thank you Camphor, for photoshopping the image! :-).

3) I was listed under the humor category on Indibloggers. I have reverted back to the personal category because that is what this blog is and will be. (Having a single digit rank on the Humor bloglist was kinda tempting a couple of months back.. hehe)

A damn shame

2006-02-01T12:10:00.000-05:00

I don't normally crib much on my blog and it is unfortunate that my first post of this calendar year should be a criticism of practices, specifically university practices and even more specifically, departmental practices.

The best thing about America is freedom. Freedom to do whatever you want to without caring much about what the people around you think. Freedom to tell your prof that you want to visit your girlfriend instead of lying about being sick and visiting her anyway. Freedom to tell your boss that you can't make it at the time he proposed because you've committed yourself to some other task however trivial it may be. Freedom to wear a daring dress and not get ogled at. Freedom to wear a cap similar to Jughead's and not get weird looks.

I have experienced this freedom to the fullest for over one and a half years now and it just about made up for being so far from home. For the first time when I least expected it, I found opposition and surprisingly it was from my own department. All for a course I was interested in doing. To cut a long story short.. I wanted to do a 3 credit course well suited to my field of research offered by the Electrical and Computer Engineering(ECE) department. This course was open to all graduate students. Seeing no problem I proceeded to register for the course but when I confirmed with my department I was told that I could take the course but would not get any credits for it. I was stupefied. Why the hell would I want to take a semester long course without receiving any credit for it? I was still not mad though. I just assumed there must be a logical reason for their opposition.

It was only later that the true reasons behind this opposition were brought to my attention and it makes me see RED. It appears that at the end of every year the Dean of the University gets a detailed statistical analysis of registration trends. Funds are allocated to a department based on the number of students registering for courses within that department. This makes sense alright but not at the cost of not letting a student do what he/she wants to do, especially if the course is interdisciplinary. The fact that I was refused credits because my department wants me to be in the "Computer Science" section of the pie-chart presented to the Dean and not in the "ECE" section is irritating to say the least.

I AM NOT A NUMBER NOR DO I WANT TO BE ONE. I am human and I don't care if I exist on their pie charts or not. All I know is- I haven't been able to do what I want to. Clearly departmental politics in some form or the other are omnipresent.

Yuletide...

2005-12-22T12:38:00.000-05:00

Mary's boy child Jesus Christ,

was born on Christmas Day,

And Man will live for ever more,

because of Christmas Day!

To say that I'm not a very religious person would be an understatement. In fact, if not for my Mom who has made my habit of going to Church every Sunday a regimen after much gentle coaxing in the form of ear-pulling, I might almost be an agnost. For eleven months of the year that is. Then the Christmas season comes around and it err.. does things to me. Things that my Mom would have never imagined possible. I clean up my room. I don't have as much of a problem getting up in the morning. I smile a lot more than I usually do. I greet people I've never met... and the list goes on.

Of all the fond memories that Christmas brings to my mind, decorations are the most striking. Every year my sis and I ask Dad for money to buy decorations. We normally get what we want. After all Christmas decorations are a far nobler cause than chocolates. After much haggling we decide on what to buy. "Shopper boy" (yours truly) is dispatched with disdain to do the actual purchasing and we then get down to the task of putting the decorations up. This is where the fun starts.

Obviously one can't start hanging things randomly all over the place. So we sit around and brainstorm on possible arrangements. Now this is not as easy as you guys might think. If I want the Christmas tree in one corner of the room, it would turn out that Nish would want it in any corner but that corner. If Nish wants the "Merry Christmas" sign on the wall facing the main door and the "Happy New Year" sign on the wall parallel to the door, I want just the opposite. If I want a diamond steamer arrangement across the ceiling, Nish wants a rectangular one. If Nish wanted to twirl the streamers before putting them up, I would want them straight. I must reluctantly state here that she gets her way most of the time except when she loses her temper and lets out a piercing scream, in which case Mom comes over and settles the issue in my favor to punish her for screaming. (*rubbing hands in glee*)

Of course some ridiculous proposals are vetoed at the very start by mom and dad.. like my proposition that we put up the longest hanging we had in the middle of the room where it would hit the heads of everyone taller than 5 feet. (All I wanted was to stand under the hanging and jump up and touch it with my head *hurt look*). Or the one where I thought that the TV and the refrigerator could do with some decoration. That proposal didn’t last long either.

The actual menial job of "putting up" everything, I'm ashamed to say was done by my sister. My role was restricted to holding the stool on which she was standing. Now before you begin to ridicule me, I would like to explain the logic behind this. Both of us had not grown to our full height then and quite often the height of one stool was insufficient. So we ended up putting one stool or chair on top of another which resulted in a highly unstable setup. Before your scorn for me intensifies, let me draw your attention to two facts. 1) I weighed more than my sis. 2) I was stronger. From 1) and 2) it follows that it would be safer for both of us if the lighter person got on to the "contraption" and the stronger person held it to prevent it from toppling over. I don't know if this logic appeals to you, but thankfully it did to my sister and she dutifully climbed up whenever needed.

Setting up the crib is perhaps the most herculean task of all. Work on this starts over two weeks before Christmas when we spread mustard seeds on soaked cotton. The figures of the Holy Family, shepherds, magi and animals are placed among the greenery after the seeds have sprouted and reached a size of about three inches. After midnight mass on Christmas eve, the 'baby Jesus' doll is placed in the center and our Christmas kicks off!

One last thing.. I NEED a break.. from studies, from work and most of all from computers of any kind. So I am now taking off for a vacation.. NO Internet, NO emails, NO chatting, NO online gaming. I'm off to gallivant around the country with my sis.. Take care everybody..

I wish you a Merry Christmas;

I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Good tidings I bring to you and your kin;

Good tidings for Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Oh, bring me a figgy pudding;

Oh, bring me a figgy pudding;

Oh, bring me a figgy pudding and a cup of good cheer

I won't go until I get some;

I won't go until I get some, so bring some out here

I wish you a Merry Christmas;

I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

TITANIC II

2005-12-11T16:45:00.000-05:00

"The discovery of two large pieces of the Titanic's hull on the ocean floor indicates the fabled luxury liner sank faster than previously thought, researchers said Monday."... is the gist of an article that appeared on CNN.com a few days ago. 5th December 2005 to be exact.

You can find the original article on CNN here..

Close to a hundred years after the tragedy, the Titanic still fascinates..

A tentative timeline for future findings about the Titanic and their corresponding news clippings follow:

April 18th, 2055
Scientists discovered yesterday that the iceberg that struck the Titanic was actually not an iceberg but a meteor that crashed into the earth around 1000 years ago. Matter embedded in the hull tells researchers that this meteor was made of a strange element that has not been discovered yet. The porous nature of this element enabled the meteor to float. There is an on-going search for a suitable name for the element. Unfortunately, though 'titanium' is the most logical name, it already exists. Most scientists are currently leaning towards 'titanicium'.

September 7th, 2082
Recent studies of depressions on the ocean floor have refuted previous claims made in 2005 that the Titanic split into two before sinking. The size of the depression indicates clearly that the Titanic was still in one piece at the time of impact. This of course means that she sank much slower than she was thought to have in 2005. However, the reason for the existence of the two large pieces remains unknown. A twenty member research group, funded by a twenty million dollar grant from the National Science foundation (NSF), has been formed to determine the reason for the split and the possible time-period of its occurrence.

October 11th, 2091
The members of the research group sanctioned to investigate the reasons behind the split hull of the Titanic nine years ago, are said to be divided in their interpretation of what exactly happened.The first group proposes the 'Earthquake theory' which claims that the split was a result of an undersea earthquake that occurred in the vicinity in the 1940s. From the surrounding damage and effect, seismologists estimate the earthquake in question to have been atleast 8.1 in magnitude on the Richter scale. The second group proposes the 'Blue Whale theory', which claims that a blue whale pair migrating south to mate and have babies in the warmer water collided head on with the wreck of the Titanic and caused the split. 'Two distinctive dents' are quoted as proof of this occurence. The sharp edges around the dents, seem to indicate that the collision occurred relatively recently, probably sometime in the 1980s. An additional one million dollars have been sanctioned to resolve this issue and bring to light the actual happenings.

November 14, 2093
Late last afternoon, markings on the hull revealed that the name of the Titanic was not really Titanic but "Some-very-very-very-long-name-like-this". The markings are too faint to be sure of the name. It is thus surmised that the popular name Titanic reflects the size of its name and not the actual size of the ship. This discovery resolved long-standing doubts in the minds of scientists about the authenticity of the 'largest-ship' claim. These doubts have been lingering ever since intense underwater research seemed to indicate that the hull did not seem to be big enough for such a claim, even if the two pieces were put together.

July 8th, 2094
John Cameron, grandson of James Cameron has announced plans for "Titanic II" scheduled to be released in the summer of 2097 exactly one hundred years after "Titanic" hit the screens. This movie will take into account recent findings since the original movie was released. In addition it will be by far the most expensive movie ever made. This time the ship itself will not cost as much since it will be smaller. However, 'titanicium', the element the meteorite was made of is considerably more expensive than ice and so will cost a mammoth one billion dollars. In order to increase the footage of this extravagant meteorite set, the movie will include a scene in which 'Leonardo di Caprio' and 'Kate Winslet' look alikes make out in a cave on the huge meteor. This is already hyped as the major attraction of the movie. Something to watch out for!! Speculation is mounting on whether the much acclaimed sketching scene of Kate Winslet in the nude will be reproduced in this version of the movie. Only time will tell. Keep your fingers crossed.

The movie will also talk of the split of the Titanic after its sinking where 'Rachel Weisz' and 'Brendon Fraser' look alikes will take on the roles of 'researchers', who during an intense making out session, chance upon the true reason behind the splitting of the hull of the Titanic. There has already been a lot of controversy over which theory will be used. At the current time, it is rumored that John(to his credit) favors the 'Earthquake theory' over the 'Blue Whale theory'. However, it is almost certain that the ending will be finalized only after the concerned research group submits its report in late 2096.

And I thought I had nothing worthwhile to do.. :D

The Big Apple

2005-12-06T11:49:00.000-05:00

I just love it up the Empire State Building. Makes me feel like I rule the world. (Though I played no direct part in it's construction.. err.. no indirect part either I think, but wouldn't be able to tell for sure.. :D) Getting up there is very easy. Just follow the simple steps outlined below...

Stand in a queue to enter the building. This queue is the fastest moving. Thankfully so, because you might just add to the architectural beauty of New York by freezing into ice-men/ice-women if the wait were even a wee bit longer.

Stand in a queue to clear security. Remember to hold your pants up while removing your belt. Also, note that you will be asked to turn on your laptop to confirm that it is not a bomb. This step kind of puzzles me. What if turning it on sets off the bomb or better still triggers a timing mechanism? DO NOT turn it on if it IS a bomb. Or atleast make sure I'm not in the vicinity before doing so.

Stand in a queue for purchasing the ticket. Shell out 14 dollars.

Stand in a queue for the elevator to the 80th floor. This queue moves at an agonizingly slow pace which is surprising given the fact that everyone in the huge building is packed into the elevator at one go. Atleast, that is the impression I got when I had to stand with my face pressed into the back of this enormous man and my hands and legs stretched out at unnatural angles. To it's credit the elevator was fast else I might have died of suffocation.

Stand in a queue to have your picture taken in front of a picture of the Empire State Building. I wonder if they realise this could be done anywhere.. in India, on a ship or on the moon dammit.

Stand in a queue for an elevator from the 80th to the 86th floor. Get crushed again.

This is it! Step out for a view from 1050 feet above ground level!

Yes, it was worth it but only just. Something has to be done about all that waiting time.

New York during the Day.

New York during twilight.

New York in the night. (Taken on an earlier trip.. I'm really proud of this pic)

This is the pic I was talking about.. in front of the picture of Empire State.. lol.

Times Square!

A trip to New York never fails to bring back memories of good old India. The same old dirty streets of Chennai, the same bumper-to-bumper traffic of Bangalore and more people than you would find around Charminar in Hyderabad. Random incidents:

I walk upto a guy and ask him directions to a certain parking garage. He looks at me scornfully and turns away to attend to something else leaving me wondering if I'd said something wrong.

A guy bangs into my friend and then glares at him as if it were all his fault! Contrast this with an incident near my university where I was looking over my shoulder and collided with this girl so hard that she fell down. Even as I helped her up, SHE was apologising profusely though it was clearly MY fault!!!

We had a rushed dinner in a Punjabi Dhaba that reminded me of the numerous 'fast food' centers in Chennai. And err.. the restroom was messier than the ones that could be found in the bus stand and railway stations back home.

It's amazing how bad incidents can make you nostalgic. (sigh)

This last picture is for Silverine, the girl whose dreams I'm haunting in my nice new crew cut.. hehe. Please note that if you look carefully enough, you should be able to see my scalp. That's short enough don't you think?... :p

Vingt faits aléatoires sur moi

2005-12-03T02:25:00.000-05:00

NO! There are no prizes for guessing what that means..

I was flattered into doing this tag when Neeta said "It'll be fun to know stuff about ya". (I know.. Flattering me is easier than tying your shoelaces.. there's one fact for you.. ;-)). She was right about it not being a tough task. Having lived for over twenty years now, it wasn't all that difficult to come up with a measly twenty facts. Of course, the facts would be more random if I jotted down my observations over a long period of time. However, I have tried to avoid stating obvious facts about myself like "I love driving", "Yes Minister is my favorite book" or "I love travelling". Here goes..

1. I like to think most people are good at heart by the simple logic that if there were more bad people in this world than good people, the world would have been destroyed long long ago..

2. I think anti-viruses are a pain in the.. err... I just format my system once in a while..

3. I will eat fruits only if there is someone around to peel the skin off for me and cut them into little pieces that will comfortably fit in my mouth. Bananas and seedless grapes are the only exception. Mom, I miss you.. sob..

4. Trust is important for me. I cannot emphasize just how much.. I hate it when people ask me for something and then keep pestering me about it. They should trust me to get things done. I also dislike it when people mistake my intentions. Either TRUST me or just stop talking to me.

5. The hair on my head is denser than the Amazon Rain forest. My hair has another peculiar quality. It represents the perpendiculars to all possible tangents that can be drawn to the surface of my head. (For the non-mathematically inclined- My hair POKES). Hence the nick name 'Porcupine'. You definitely do NOT want to run your hand through my hair. Several people have had to pay for their affection by going around with bandaged palms for a whole month.

6. No one has beaten me yet in scrabble.. :p

7. I like being alone sometimes and don't understand why people find this more difficult to understand than even the most complicated physics theorems.

8. If I talk pleasantly to you all the time you're probably mistaken in assuming that I'm a great friend of yours. If on the other hand I argue a lot with you and keep making suggestions for your betterment then I probably care for you a lot more than I could ever put into words.

9. I have never had a crush on a celebrity. Only on real people I happen to meet. Or atleast talk to.. ;-).

10. I need two pillows to sleep. One for my head and one to hug. (Though one will probably suffice after I get married... ;-)).

11. I mess up my desk pretty often but I can't bring myself to make a mess of my bed.

12. I tend to get attached a tad too easily.

13. I speak at a speed comparable to the good old Concorde of the yesteryears.. I have to make it a point to slow down when compering so people can actually catch atleast 50% of what I'm saying.

14. I can be a bundle of contradictions sometimes. For instance, I want a wife who would make me coffee every morning, pack a nice lunch for me and return home before I do in the evening to welcome me. Yeah.. Who doesn't? The problem is I also want someone who can kid me around, fight with me and take sarcastic digs at me. There's your contradiction for you.. :D

15. I find it very hard to say NO.

16. I love having a lot of credit cards in my wallet, though I don't have the heart to use them very often. I've got some beautiful designs. One of my university, one of a lightning strike and a transparent one.

17. I dislike most computer games. Real time strategy games are an exception though. I once played Age of Empires for over 20 hours at a stretch! But those days are gone.. sigh.

18. The last time I watched television for more than a few hours at a stretch was during the first innings of the World cup 2003 finals. TV has been a strict no-no since then.

19. I have spent more time collecting/downloading songs than actually listening to them.

20. I normally like to plan well in advance but find some on-the-spur-of-the-moment decisions adventurous. We discussed going to New York over a late dinner today and we're leaving in 4 hours from now! I better catch some shut eye now...

But before that.. I've got some unfinished business to attend to.. (laughs devilishly). I regret not tagging anyone the last two times. This is where I get back at my previous taggers.

I hereby declare..

Silverine
Sayesha
Vidya
Camphor
Prasanna
Vibha
Harish

as tagged by moi! DO IT OR I WILL COME TO HAUNT YOU IN YOUR DREAMS!!

Why did I come to the United States?

2005-11-29T23:25:00.000-05:00

In all honesty, the answer to that question must be..

"I DON'T KNOW"

All I know is: ever since I was a small kid, I had wanted to come here. I consider myself logical in most respects, but in this case I must admit that logic has very little to do with it.

I did not come here to obtain a first class education in my field of study. I did not come here with the intention of expanding my knowledge by putting to good use the technology at hand. I did not come here because of a lack of work/study opportunities back home. I did not come here because there were no institutions of higher learning back home in India that were worthy of me. I did not come here because of the much acclaimed work environment.

I came here because, I was naive enough to fool myself into believing that it would be a whole new world. Oh.. it's a whole new world alright. Only, I do the same things here that I did back home.. lol.

- I still study at the last minute.

- I still spend hours before the computer. (outside of classes/work)

- I still drive anytime I get a chance.

- I still accept any invitation to play games, irrespective of my workload.

- I still to listen to Hindi/Tamil music and watch Hindi/Tamil movies.

- I still dress like I used to. (No cargos and the like)

- I still have more Indian friends than American ones.

And most importantly,

I STILL THINK THE SAME WAY!

I guess I always will.... :-).

It's a small small world!

2005-11-23T01:50:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, someone mailed me out of the blue and said.. "You mentioned something about National Public School, Bangalore in one of your posts. Did you study in the Indiranagar branch? I don't remember you, but I am 23 and I studied there from 1986-2000."

I replied saying that I was indeed from the same branch and that I studied there from 1986-1994, but that I didn't recollect her either. We then exchanged a couple of mails about our teachers and classmates and concluded from their names that we only studied in the same section in the first standard! Since we had never known each other in school, the emails died down soon. But I was left wondering about my really close friends back then.

Although most events and people so far back in the past are hazy memories, I never could forget this girl who used to sit next to me in the fifth standard. The reason being that I used to make her cry almost every single day with some prank or the other. I would place my pencil box on her seat when she stood up to answer a question. I would imitate her voice. I would steal her pencils, rubbers and sharpeners. I must also mention here, the competition we had on who could write in a "smaller" print.. lol. You would need a microscope to read what we had written.

So I decided to try and look her up on Names Database. And *surprise* *surprise* it worked. I found the matching first and last name! I crossed my fingers and dashed away a quick message. A few days later.. I get an email that started.. "Hi Leon, This is the same stupid girl who used to sit next to you in fifth standard..." That made my day.. :-)

Of course, I don't expect to be in touch for very long. She studied with me 11 years back.. So what? We have gone our different ways since. No friends in common, no events in common, no classes in common, no job in common. We have probably grown up very different from what we were. She is as good as a stranger now. In fact, if I happened to meet her, I wouldn't have anything to say!

But that still doesn't take away the thrill of having communicated in some way with someone you never in your wildest dreams imagined you would ever talk to or hear of again...

To think my blogging triggered this.. :D.

Yours truly in a tux.. :D

2005-11-21T01:08:00.000-05:00

I just got back from our Diwali function.. It was AWESOME!!! As promised.. here are a couple of pictures of me in a suit.. (sob.. I've lost my anonymity totally now.. :D).

ALL of us!

A picture of me after the event..

I haven't got a chance to look at all the pictures.. will post more later!

Pennies - A royal pain

2005-11-16T20:49:00.000-05:00

If you are new to America, the first thing that catches your attention when you are visiting a friend's house is a mountain of ancient coins. It could be anywhere, though more often than not in a prominent location in the living room. In a cover or in a bowl. Your curiosity is aroused. As you move in for a closer look, wondering if your friends are hardcore numismatists or have struck treasure of some kind, you see "1 cent" written boldly across the centre of a coin in the pile and realisation strikes.. Pennies!

Before we move on let me tell you what I think of pennies.

I THINK PENNIES ARE A ROYAL PAIN IN THE ..... In keeping with the tradition of this blog, I will steer clear from profanity and resist my urge to use an expletive here. But you get my point. Quite literally, in fact. I should know. Everyday, I squirm around in my chair cursing the ten odd pennies I've forgotten to remove from my wallet the previous night. Every night I find a new hole in my pant pockets courtesy the same pennies, that I had moved from my wallet to my pockets after violent protests from my err.. behind. Now don't get me wrong. I am not a coward who shirks at the very mention of pain or discomfort. I would gladly go through a lot of pain for a worthy cause but for something I consider to rank among the top 10 of all useless things in the world.. I REFUSE.

America is supposed to be the richest country in the world. Looking at the number of pennies being passed around, you would think she is a nation of beggars. Quite frankly, even beggars would have no use for pennies and I'm sure they have their own unusable collections of pennies stashed away. The onus is on the word "unusable". If all the unused pennies in America were melted we would have enough metal to lay a railway track from Los Angeles to New York.

At the current exchange rate, 1 cent would translate to ~40 paise. For ~2 cents in India, you could get ONE banana. In the US however for 2 cents you would get ZERO bananas. In fact, zero of everything. You would need ~20 cents to buy a banana. And I really can't think of anything much cheaper than that. I'm sure you will agree with me that any sane person would prefer to pay in a higher currency than carry around 20 coins. Lest there be any doubt, let me also state that I am as sane as my next door neighbor(Who is quite sane, let me assure you). So the coins in my wallet/pocket are dumped on my desk. I pay for a banana or anything else for that matter in a higher currency say quarters or dollars. What do I get in return? More pennies!!! grrrr... The height of the mountain on my desk is still rising. I'm afraid it will touch the ceiling before I graduate.

In the highly unlikely event that an American Senator or Congressman reads this post and decides to do something drastic like propose a bill abolishing pennies, he couldn't. Why couldn't he? Because of the abominable practice of pricing items in the following fashion:
Gas (1 gallon): 1$ 99c or after the recent increase 2$ 47c
Milk (1 gallon): 1$ 59c
Bananas (1 pound): 59c
Tomatoes (1 pound): 99c
Items on restaurant menu: 2$ 99c to 19$ 99c (but not a single round figure)

Note that every transaction REQUIRES that you get 'useless' pennies back. Do marketers seriously think that consumers are fooled by this "psychological pricing" gimmick? Do they really think that people would think of a 9$ 99c purchase costing them in the range of 9$ and not 10$. And by any chance do such people exist? If so, in which country? I would like to settle there and replace Bill Gates as the richest man in the world.

I thank the stars for the widespread use of credit/debit cards, for in their absence, utter chaos would reign in the United States; caused not by hurricanes "Rita" or "Katrina" but the force generated by continuously passing pennies back and forth.

What prompted this post:A few months ago, a friend of mine, Sunil, left UNH to study at a university in Florida. He left me some stuff that he thought I could use. I was rummaging through them today and found this polythene bag filled with pennies!!! With friends like him, who needs enemies?

If any resident of America reading this post would like to claim that she/he has never been in possession of more than a hundred pennies at some point in time, please post a comment with your contact information. I would like to set up an appointment with you for I have never had the privilege of meeting an insane person.

I'm attaching a picture of the pile of pennies on my desk for added emphasis...

Bhangra... and me!

2005-11-13T02:19:00.000-05:00

Preparations are in full swing for Diwali. Yup you heard right.. Diwali may be long gone for the rest of the world but it isn't over yet for UNH. A couple of days ago yours truly was asked to participate in a Bhangra dance. Yours truly very enthusiastically reported for a practice session. It must be noted that I have not done much dancing in the last 10 years except for swinging my arms and legs like a madman at a few dance parties. Much to my dismay I discovered that Bhangra required feats of a greater magnitude.

Firstly, it was expected that I would get my hands and legs to move simultaneously. I tackled this problem very intelligently using the divide and conquer method. I first got my leg movement right. Then I got my hand movement right. Finally, I tried to put both together. "Tried" is right, because I couldn't. When my legs moved, my hands would be paralysed and vice versa. It was downright frustrating.

On top of that, I was expected to get my shoulders to shake. However hard I tried, my shoulders remained rigid and unmoving and only my hips would shake. I guess I've seen too many of those tamil songs. Imagine concentrating hard to move your shoulder muscles and your hips shaking instead. After giving serious thought to the matter, I tried to consciously move my hips to see if my shoulders would move but they didn't. More frustration.

After the one and a half hour practice session, I was offered feedback from several members of the audience(participants in other dances). Comments ranged from "It would look as if we were short of people, if the compere had to step on stage to perform" to "Perhaps you would be more suited to a break dance or a tamil folk dance."

I sat pondering over the hidden comments for some time and then decided to gracefully withdraw from the dance and stick to compering, administrative tasks and a skit. The sigh of relief that emanated from the gathering could probably have been heard as far as India.

All's well that ends well.. :-)

A new look

2005-11-10T00:03:00.000-05:00

Exams were announced today for two of the three courses I'm taking this semester, 'Distributed Operating Systems' and 'Interactive Data Visualization'. Almost immediately, I inexplicably developed a passion for CSS and HTML, both of which would at best fetch me zero points on the above mentioned exams. Hence this 'new' look.

I have deviated from a rule of thumb I normally follow very strictly, "black text on a white background". But I thought a change would help, just as moving furniture around your room once in a while makes you feel good. The Christmas season is fast approaching and I would like to keep this background until after Christmas. But go ahead and yell at me if the background sucks so I know that a change to a more subtle background is called for.

I bought a car!!!

2005-11-07T00:53:00.000-05:00

Yup.. A "Volkswagen Passat". It's been about three weeks now... Seven silly things I did after I bought my car..

Went round and round the parking lot 10 times before having the heart to park.
Purposely missed an exit, drove 10 miles to the next exit and payed a damned toll in between.
Drove through campus playing hindi/tamil music at a volume that almost shattered the windows AND my ear drums, getting dirty looks from all and sundry. (I didn't give a damn though.. )
Drove 5 miles to 'Dunkin donuts' for hot chocolate, three days in one week at 3 am in the morning.
Spent most of last month's pay cheque on gas. (sigh)
Drove to the dining hall, downtown store and church all of which are not more than 500 metres from my dorm.
Took a cloth and wiped the dust off my car.. (This takes the cake for being the most unusual thing I've ever done.. It is so unlike me to do something like that.. hehe)

Pics follow..

Right now, I'm thinking of a name to christen my car with... ;-)

The London 'tube'

2005-11-04T01:17:00.000-05:00

I was doing some research for my graphics project when I came across something interesting. A map of the London underground also called 'the tube'...

Now that you've seen the picture and are wondering at it's significance, let me tell you that it was designed in 1931 by 'Harry Beck' who first realized that "when you are underground it doesn't matter where you are." He proceeded to distort the scale and in doing so created an entirely new London totally different from the disorderly geography of the city above. If the tunnels were modeled geographically, this is how the map would look..

The 'tube map' has since been copied widely by all major cities in the world in maps of their respective undergrounds. Until 1931 however, all maps were geographic and confused the users to no end. No wonder they lapped up the 'tube map' when it was released.. lol..

I was just wondering about how things that were previously unknown seem so perfectly obvious to us.. so much so that we fail to value the creative efforts of our predeccessors.

The title of my blog..

2005-11-03T02:15:00.000-05:00

When I first started blogging, there were mixed reactions about the title of my blog. Some thought I couldn't come up with anything else. Others thought I was trying to be pompous. A few credited me with a little more 'thinking' and asked me what my title meant. Their questions ranged from "respect to whom or what?" to "why greatest possible"? "with respect" would do if you want to be polite and courteous and state that you respect the views of your readers.

Though politeness and courtesy are important to me, they are NOT the reason behind this title.

To cut a long story short, the title has been picked from the "Yes Minister" series which I talked about here and here. However, I am not yet willing to spell out the context in which the phrase has been used.. After all, I have waited four months hoping that someone as great a fan of that book as I, would come by and spot that term immediately.. I can wait a little longer. A 50$ prize to the first person who discovers the context.. And I'm not KIDDING. :D

Clue 1: I guess I WAS trying to be a little pompous.. ;-)

Clue 2: The underlying theme of most of my posts (atleast until date)..

Recap..

2005-11-01T23:31:00.000-05:00

It's Diwali today and having said all I had to say on the subject in a previous post I have nothing to say.. :-(

So I'm redirecting you to Out of thin "smoke"

I know.. I know.. I should have waited until Diwali to post that. Don't rub it in.

I can safely say "Happy Diwali" (Happy Deepavali to some) now! And yes.. I missed being blasted out of bed for a second consecutive year.. (sigh)

A Guide to the Successful Completion Of Your Engineering Project

2005-10-30T01:43:00.001-05:00

For quite some time now, I have been badgered with innumerable comments from engineering students back home about the hardships faced while venturing to complete their final semester project required for graduation. I have faithfully preserved every mention of this subject, added my own personal experiences to this amazingly huge collection of anecdotes and have come up with a list of FAQs that I'm sure will be of great sevice to the miserable engineering students of Tamil Nadu.

*Disclaimer*
This guide is presented with the best intentions at heart. It does not guarantee a high score or even a passing grade in your project. The author is not liable for any injury (mental or physical) that may result from the application of the ideas outlined in this post.

FAQ

Q) When does the torture start?

A) Early in the fourth year, when you are asked present your staff with a title for the project you will be pursuing in your final semester and state where or with whom you will be doing it.

Q) Isn't that an easy task?

A) It should be.. but for several conditions imposed by the department.
- The project must not be done at some project consultancy
- You will have normal classes for three days of the week and can only work for 2 days on your project in any organisation that you choose.

Q) Those conditions don't seem too bad..

A) Indeed? Please note that two days a week for one semester is about a month and a half in real time and that, every company representative will argue, is how long it will take you to get acquainted with the location of the restroom and the canteen on the premises. Which company do you think will take you on those terms?

Q) So if a company won't take us and we can't buy a project, how do we present a project title?

A) Hah! Now you get to the point. There are two ways to approach this problem
1) You can request your father's friend's friend's friend's grandfather's friend who owns a company to kindly give you a project, which they will do out of pity 90 % of the time.
2) You can go ahead and buy one and then tell a blatant lie that you didn't buy it.
The first is demeaning sometimes and the second one is dishonest. Being a man of self respect and a true Gandhian I decided on a third approach; "To think one up", which by the way is the easiest way to go about picking a topic.

Q) What if I'm not smart enough to think of one that would satisfy them?

A) Relax.. That's what I'm here for. The day before the title is due, run through the 10-step "Project title generating process" that I have come up with:

Step 1: Think of several complicated terms in your field of study. Write them all down and then pick the one that is most impressive to look at.

Step 2: Try to find a term synonymous to the term you first picked. Don't worry, it's not very hard. Strangely, almost all fields of study have several terms to mean the same thing.

Step 3: Now join the words you picked with a conjunction or preposition of some kind. If you did a good job of picking synonyms "AND" should work. If you didn't, don't fret; one of the others will fit perfectly fine.

Step 4: Find a word synonymous to the word 'project' since that is what we are talking about. Some examples are "strategy", "proposal", "scheme", "operation", "applications", "setup", "program". These six words should do for almost every field of study.

Step 5: Append the word obtained in step 4 to the term obtained in step 3.

Step 6: Think of a complicated word/term outside your field of study. The onus is on the word "OUTSIDE". This is important to widen the scope of your project so that you cannot be pinned down at a later date.

Step 7: Find some word/term that is currently "HOT" in your field of study. This will raise considerable interest in your project and give you the status of a person performing groundbreaking research. For example at the time of my project title submission some hot topics included "Wireless", "Security", "Bluetooth", "Virtual Private Networks", "Quality-of-service".

Step 8: Pick a word that is synonymous to "implementation", "experiment", or "evaluation". This step is of utmost importance. Pick "implementation" only if you plan to actually work hard and come up with something that does something. Pick "experiment" if you plan to do something but don't know what. And finally, pick "evaluation" if you plan to do nothing at all.

Step 9: Combine the terms obtained in steps 5, 6, 7 and 8 suitably in a way that makes sense. Though this may appear hard to do at first, I'm sure you will find that the words fit together quite easily.

Step 10: As a final test, count the number of words in the resulting term and ensure the number is greater than or equal to 10. This ensures that the reader will not grasp the title on the first reading. Note that people are always impressed with things that they cannot grasp. So your title will make a favourable first impression. If your term passes this test..

VOILA.. you have your TITLE.

The title I came up with using the above 10-step process is presented below:

"Data Warehousing and Data Mining Applications to Electrical Power System Security Assessment"

I picked "security" because it seemed to bring awe into the eyes of listeners. I could practically see people imagining viruses floating around in space when I mentioned the term. And of course I picked "assessment" which is a synonym of "evaluation" because I planned to absolutely nothing.

Q) Whew.. that seems like a complicated process?

A) Believe me.. It isn't.. Atleast to me, it seems infinitely more appealing than roaming the streets begging for projects from companies or shelling out hard cash to buy one. In any case a project team consists of three members, so you should be done in no time at all if you put your heads together.

Q) Okay.. So I've submitted the title.. What do I do next?

A) Absolutely nothing of course unless you were foolish enough to pick "implementation", "experiment" or something similar for your title.

Q) So I do nothing.. What happens next?

A) Nothing much until the start of the next semester. At the very beginning of the final semester however, we will have what is called a "zeroeth review"

Q) And pray what might that be?

A) Exactly what it says.. "Zeroeth review".. A review where you present "Zero" things. Just make sure you have the title with you on a flashy powerpoint slide instead of a piece of paper.

Q) Then what?

A) Do nothing again.. until the the day before the first review?

Q) Say, how many reviews will we have?

A) If you don't count the zeroeth, three in all.. first, second and final? The first review is the hardest to get through. Once you manage that, it should be plain sailing.

Q) What happens on the day before the first review?

A) You get together with your project-mates and prepare a power point presentation.

Q) Isn't that difficult to do without having done any work on the project?

A) Not very. Start by thinking up a block diagram with atleast 10 blocks, that suits your project title. It need not make sense. Just make sure that the three of you are in consensus about what the block diagram means. Then go ahead and allocate a slide for each of the blocks on the block diagram. There.. you already have over 10 slides. Then of course, there are slides that the staff make mandatory. These include a "title" slide (yes.. again), a "Project goal" slide (explain the terms in your title here), a "project requirements" slide (Include all software/hardware that you have ever heard of. This may not all fit on a single slide, which is better for us. Put the remaining information on a different slide(s)). Also, we have the "Project Strengths" and the "Project weaknesses" slide. It really helps to use big words like "reliable", "stable" and "efficient" for strengths. Make sure you include "difficult to implement" or "expensive to implement" as one of the weaknesses. That gives you an excuse for the absence of an implementation. The "Future Enhancements" slide is a full toss. Hit it for a six by conjuring up all sorts of enhancements that might only be possible in the year 3000. After all they didn't mention how far in the future the enhancements had to be made did they? Finally don't forget the 'thank you" slide. Though it my seem trivial, note that it would add to the slide count. You should have atleast 20 slides if you followed the instructions above which will do for a decent 15 minute presentation if you don't rush through.

Q) Hmm... Seems manageable. But I guess the second and final reviews are going be tougher?

A) No, you're wrong. Like I said before the first review is the hardest. Keep in mind that you already have a presentation in your hands. All you have to do is shuffle a few slides here and there for the second review and you are through. I have actually seen the exactly same presentations for the first and second reviews.

Q) (hopefully) Will it be the same for the third review too?

A) Well.. Almost. You will have to have some sort of a results slide here. Now.. don't panic. All you have to do is use a variation of the "Thinking up" process that we used for the title. Just make sure that there are plenty of tables and graphs.

Q) And we are done? Woweee!

A) Wait a minute.. There's something else that could cause you a lot of trouble if you are not
careful. The PROJECT DOCUMENTATION. Several things to remember while preparing your documentation.
1) It should be atleast 100 pages in length. Though that seems to be a lot, in this Internet age, it is not. Browse for related stuff but don't make the mistake of copying and pasting. Change the tense of every sentence you are 'borrowing'. If the "borrowed" literature is in the present tense make it past and vice versa.
2) Go to the library for once and add all the books related (even remotely) to your project to the references section. Note that you NOT lying here. After all, you HAVE referred each book for the author, title and year of publication.
3) Invariably your project guide will try to interfere with the documentation process by offering weird suggestions. Just nod your head and ignore them. If not, you will have a document that has the font "Courier" for the headings, "Times New Roman" for text and a variety of font sizes from 8 to 40.
4) As a final test, make sure the Table of contents (TOC) is formatted exactly as your guide wants it. He/she will almost certainly mistakenly assume that everything outlined in the TOC is actually present in the document.

Q) Cool.. thanks.. Any other suggestions?

A) Don't go to get your documentation signed until the very last day specified. Else your document may be scrutinized and you will be ordered to make some corrections. On the last day there's nothing much they can do except sign. Once they sign, you are all set to make your project demo before an external examiner.

Q) DEMO.. (shudder) how are we going to do that?

A) C'mon, whether or not your demo works you're going to get 99 if not 100. So I'm not going to waste my time answering that question just to save you a single mark. I really ought to get going. I have to run through my title generating process to whip up a project title for my graphics course. Over and out.

Fun in the mountains..

2005-10-20T01:01:00.000-05:00

I organized a social to the White Mountains this past weekend, for the students living in my dorm. For those who don't already know (most of you probably fall in that category), the White Mountains of New Hampshire are ancient mountains that were formed before the Himalayas, Alps or the Rockies. We were supposed to drive up Mt. Washington, where the fastest wind ever had been recorded (231 mph), but weather played spoilsport and we ended up going to a different spot - Frankonia Notch. I hadn't been there before and didn't know what to expect. I was in for a pleasant surprise though.

We were 16 in four cars. The drive up there was amusing especially since one of my friends took it upon her to overtake me and display signs when she passed me. Imagine my consternation when she passes with one of the others in her car holding a piece of paper to the window that read "Loser Leon". Of course I retaliated by overtaking her with the sign "Eat my dust" put up on a window. The rest of the journey went by with both of us writing silly notes. Pretty kiddish I know.. But what the heck.. we all need to chill once in a while... ;-).

When we arrrived at our destination, a 'free' presentation on the mountains was just beginning. Like all 'free' stuff, it was substandard and the only phrase that remains in my head is "FOUR HUNDRED MILLION YEARS AGO". They must have repeated that phrase at least four hundred million times in that presentation.. damn I just can't get it out of my head.

Then the actual fun began. We went on a two mile hike called the "Flume Gorge". It was an amazing hike through the mountains. We passed mountain rivers and waterfalls all in the middle of a scintillating display of trees colored every shade from green to orange to red. (The much talked about "fall colors" that people from all over the world come to check out). Pics follow..

Btw, I forgot to mention that it was pouring cats and dogs all through the hike.. lol.

Winter is fast approaching. This is probably the last trip for this year.. :-(. There's a good side though.. With the lack of opportunity to roam around, I will probably settle down and get some work done.. :D

Playing chess?.. No spectators please..

2005-10-19T01:04:00.000-05:00

When I play a chess game, I hate having people sitting around and watching. Because the inevitable always happens. It would be my turn to move.. and then this happens.. ALWAYS..

Spectator 1 : You are taking so long to move..
Me (thinking) : Who asked you to stand around watching me play. Don't you have anything better to do?
Spectator 2 : You could checkmate him in 6 moves..
Me (thinking) : Oh yeah.. if my opponent forfeits all the five chances he has in between.. even my baby niece could do it.
Spectator 3 (to my opponent, smiling) : I know your plan
Me (find what I overlooked after checking board and think) : Great.. Now I don't even know if I can take credit for winning. I might have missed that if not for Mr. Bigmouth.
Spectator 4 : Your end game is not very good
Me (thinking) : Thank you for telling me something I already know.

On top of all this, you have spectators who smile smugly when you make a move, like they've spotted your mistake. You have others who nod their head and say approvingly "good move, the best you could have made". Do they really expect me to believe they are qualified enough to talk about an unconditional 'best' move from among thousands? And then, there are still others who want to discuss what they, their parents and their grandparents would have done in the given situation. If you give them a chance they would even go so far as to discuss what Vishwanathan Anand would have done in the circumstances..

Bah!!

Another random question that has never ceased to puzzle me? How come most girls don't play chess? After all it is not a physically demanding game...

Screeeeeeeeeech!!!

2005-10-11T00:46:00.000-05:00

This is a sound that has shattered glass, bent metal, drilled holes in walls, displaced heavy furniture like sofas and tables, forced every animal in the vicinity of it's occurence to bury their heads in the nearest water source, increased my Dad's blood pressure and given my Mom numerous headaches. It is also the sound of my sister screaming, the sound that has been haunting me for 22 years of my life.

My little sister made her entrance into this world of ours on October 11th 1983 with the sole aim of hogging the limelight from the deserving me. After 1 year, 1 month and 4 days of sheer bliss a little imp crept in and my life was never the same again. (sigh)

After my mom returned from the hospital, I went to take a look at this sibling of mine who had dared to keep my mom away from me for two whole days. I was all set to wage a full war to win back what was rightfully mine. But, observing that she couldn't even stand on her own two legs (I had learnt to, a couple of weeks back) and being a fair man(err.. baby) who fought only his equals, I let her off with a menacing look that was intended as a warning. But she proceeded to flaunt my warning for the next 2 years and clung to Mom, crying whenever she was put down even if it were only for a few moments.

But that was only the beginning. You will understand what I meant about 'hogging the limelight' when you read this incident about my admission to Kindergarten.

I was supposed to meet the principal before being admitted to the school in question. For whatever reason(that I can't fathom till date) my Dad decided to take my sister along with us. During the meeting I was asked this phenomenally difficult question. "What is your name?". While I was thinking hard trying to come up with the best possible answer my sister yells out "Leon Nirmal Francis". I get mad. Did she really think I did not know the answer to that one. I was just debating on "Leon" or "Nirmal" or "Leon Nirmal". I was certainly not intending to give out "Francis". If she was too young to understand the finer issues of life like privacy she should have just shut up. Thank goodness the Principal was able to see through my elaborate thinking process, else I might have been denied admission and this blog would have never happened.

In addition to hogging the limelight by fascinating visitors with her gift of the gab, she also took advantage of my niceness(ahem..;-)). Whenever she got into the mood for eating a dairy milk chocolate she would come to me and ask me to go to the store and buy one for both of us.
Nish: Nimu.. I just have to have a Cadburys bar now
Me: So get it yourself
Nish: But my hair is all messy and I have to get changed. You can go as you are.
Me: No way.. I told you last time that I would never do it again..
Nish: Please
Me: No
Nish: Please, please, please..
Me: No means No.

My sister leaves. I heave a sigh of relief. Exactly half an hour later I go the shop and get her the chocolate. I have wasted 30 minutes fighting with my conscience and mind you the devil in me always wins. My sis takes the chocolate with a thank you and a smile that I suspect is a smirk. AND THIS HAPPENS EVERY WEEK. grrrr...

My sister's enormous fear of cockroaches has bothered me to no end. A random incident for emphasis follows:
I get up in the middle of the night for a drink of water. I see 'something' wrapped up on our swing in the living room. My curiosity was aroused and I bend forward to peer and see if it was really what I thought it was- "A human being"(Looking back I think it was very brave of me). At that very instant the 'something' opened it's eyes and let out a classic scream that served three purposes 1. Woke everyone in the household. 2. Confirmed the identity of the 'something' in the swing. 3. Left me without my sense of hearing for the next couple of days. The investigation that followed revealed that after sighting a cockroach in her room, my sister had preferred to sleep on the swing since it did not touch the floor. I was promptly displaced from my bed and sent to sleep in my sister's room. Feeling especially malevolent, I could not resist talking about the increasing number of flying cockroaches in my room.

I could forgive my sister everything but for the fact that she took a dislike to almost every girl that I liked. Imagine the following scenario when I come back home after meeting up with a girl I happen to like..
Me: (with stars in my eyes) Isn't that girl wonderful?
Nish: hah! what taste you have in girls..
Me: What was wrong with her?
Nish: I found her real boring when you got her home earlier this week.
Me: What do you mean boring?
Nish: Let me put it this way.. She talks about the weather beautifully.
Me: Now.. you aren't being fair. She doesn't know you well enough to talk about personal things.
Nish: Yes.. but did she have to nod her head to everything I say
Me: (nastily) Everyone would nod their head to everything you say hoping you'd just shut up.
Nish: (patronizingly) now, don't get upset. She's ok.. but not your type.
Me: How the hell do you know who's my type and who's not?
Nish: (more patronizingly) I know, that's all
Me: Give me a logical reason
Nish: (even more patronizingly) you wouldn't understand
Me: (jumping up and down) I WOULD. I DARE YOU TO TELL ME
Nish: Nimu.. you're such a baby.. Why don't YOU give me a logical reason for liking her?
Me: err.. she's a nice girl
Nish: why do you think she's nice
Me: err.. she talks well
Nish: why do you say she talks well? Did she give you a detailed weather forecast too?
Me: No dammit, we discussed culture and politics.
Nish: Those are big topics indeed. I'm willing to give her the benefit of doubt and accept that she did talk about those subjects.
Me: (Beaming)
Nish: (continues..) But given the fact that you don't know a damn thing about both those topics, wouldn't you agree she's not your type?
Me: (Grit my teeth and count slowly upto 100 wishing murder wasn't a crime in India)

After illustrating the numerous ways in which my sis irritates me it's only fair that I gloat a little about about how I get back at her. Consider a typical conversation between us:
Nish: And there was this guy I met in that college fest.
Me: Mmmm
Nish: He was so interesting. Unlike most other guys i've met.
Me:Mmmm
Nish: Didn't keep trying to fall over his feet doing me favors
Me:Mmmm
Nish: We talked about a lot of stuff. He knows so much. He's like a walking encyclopedia. Imagine me not feeling bored after talking to a guy for 2 whole hours.
Me: Mmmm
Nish: He seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say. He said I talked well and that I should go the debate competition next week.
Me: Mmmm
Nish: What do you think?
Me: Mmmm
Nish: well.. WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Me: Mmmm
Nish: NIRMAL
Me: (looking at her with a jolt) huh?
Nish: You weren't listening to a word I said
Me: I was. You were talking about some guy err.. in some college fest.. err no in some debate competition (stare stupidly at her)
Nish: I'm never going to tell you anything again.
Me: I wish
My sis Walks away with a look that would've killed everyone except me(I've developed a kind of immunity over the years).

Looking back, I must say that I've taken my sister for granted. I'm sorry Nish, for all the times I've neglected you for other (ahem).. girls, for all the times I've made you play second fiddle to my computer, for all the times the book I was reading was too important for me to stop and listen to you, for all the times I've leaked out your secrets, for all the times I have ridiculed your driving and finally for all the times I've asked you to stop yelling.

Because right now sitting miles and miles away from you, that 'Screeeeeeeeeech..' is the sound of music. MANY MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY!! I LOVE YOU!

Now.. before you start floating among the clouds, there's something you must know.

MUMMY LOVES ME MORE THAN YOU!!! SO THERE!!! :p

Tagged again!

2005-10-02T22:28:00.000-05:00

*Personal Post Disclaimer*

There are some people in this world who just beg for punishment. Silverine is one of them. After reading my ramblings on "Books" I can't figure for the life of me, how she dared to tag me for a second time. This is a 'Seven thing' tag.. Read ahead and you will know what I mean..

Seven things you plan to do before you die
Assumption: I live to be atleast 60.

1. see the world
2. get married and have 5 kids (wife permitting.. lol)
3. write a book
4. Be the CEO of a company
5. own a BMW AND a Mercedes
6. drive 10 000 000 miles (lol)
7. fly an aeroplane (and buy one.. ;-))

Seven things you can do!!

1. Read like I used to
2. Play Badminton, squash, tennis, chess
3. Stay at home in the weekends and blog!!
4. Spend more time keeping in touch with friends back home
5. Play "Age of Empires"
6. Enjoy both solitude and community
7. Watch 'Friends'.

Seven things you can't do!!!

1. Cook
2. swim.. :-(
3. Say No to people.. (I really have to learn to do this fast)
4. sit simply in one place
5. talk to people who say things they don't mean
6. be away from my computer for more than a day
7. sit on the floor with my legs crossed

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex!!

1. Intelligent/frank conversation
2. humor
3. How much the person in question likes me
4. looks
5. calmness and poise
6. Walk
7. Good dressing sense

Seven things you say most!!!

1. Hi
2. Damn
3. Are you kidding me?
4. Sure
5. Poda/podi
6. cool/chill
7. see you later

Seven celebrity crushes!

Believe me when I say celebrity crushes are not my thing. I have crushes on real people. And when I don't have a crush on anyone, I just conjure up some imaginary character that I fancy, to dream about. So I'll just mention those that I think are attractive...

1. Jennifer Aniston
2. Meg Ryan
3. Catherine Zeta Jones
4. Kajol
5. Renée Zellweger
6. Rachel Weisz
7. Trisha

It took quite a bit of thinking to come up with answers to some of these questions. But I know a little more about myself now. I guess I should take the time to introspect more often. :-)

Niagara

2005-09-07T22:33:00.000-05:00

During the weekend of 3rd September, I set out on my longest drive ever to visit my 'little' sister who most people consider to be my grandmother. I was driving from Durham, NH to Toledo, Ohio. A 13 hour drive according to Mapquest!

I passed very close to Niagara Falls on the way to my sister's place and decided on the spur of the moment that I would take her to Niagara. So after spending a day catching up with the happenings in her life and doing some basic shopping, we started for Niagara on Sunday morning. It was a real fun trip that I do not have words to describe. Take a look at the pictures I've embedded below.

Here's the car I was driving..

I got home on Monday night. I had driven exactly 2511 miles. 4017 kms ie. I feel great.

Today is my birthday.. Happy Birthday to me.. I love ME. :-)

To blog or not to blog...

2005-08-29T10:58:00.000-05:00

The last ten days have been so busy that I seriously doubt if I can do justice to my blogging!! And by the way, classes only began TODAY! [sigh]. Several things that kept me busy during the last couple of weeks include undergoing training that my position as Assistant Manager of Babcock Hall demands and meeting deadlines for my job at the InterOperability Laboratory (IOL).

Moving on to happier things. Durham, NH looks positively ALIVE. The bustle of activity that the beginning of the year brings, is a welcome change from the haunting quietness of the summer. The roads are packed and traffic has actually been brought to a halt in a few places. And the best part is I keep running into friends on the roads. :-).

A new year also means new students. Relatively few Indians arrived at UNH this year. But enough to substantially increase the size of our cricket teams. :p. Answering the 1034589 quesstions that the newcomers ask is another major reason for my slapdash blogging. But given the fact that I still hold the record for asking the most number of questions(last year), ie 24000008900080, I guess I shouldn't be complaining.

I did notice a trend in the questions the newcomers are asking this year. Instead of "What courses should I take?", "Which prof is easy on grades?", they ask "What laptop should I buy?", "Which cell phone plan should I opt for?", "When are the swing dancing classes?", "Will you teach me tennis?". God help them!!!

I guess this post is special in a way. It's my shortest post.. :D.

If books could talk...

2005-08-20T23:26:00.000-05:00

*Personal post disclaimer*
This post should probably be read only by my friends and those who want to know me better. It is as factual as can be and is about ME alone. I have been book tagged by Silverine and Prasanna and thought I would recant my reading history exactly as it happened.

I embarked on my long reading journey on an extremely boring evening during a visit to my uncle's place in Cochin when I was 5 years old. My dad took a Tinkle that was lying around and slowly taught me to read. I haven't looked back since. We had a great library at National Public School in Bangalore and were encouraged to read from a very early age. Sometime during first grade I went beyond comics and got a Famous Five home. I then pestered my parents to get me one for my birthday which they did. The first book I ever owned is thus "Five on a secret trail" by Enid Blyton purchased for a pricy 30 Rs. Then began the craze.. I wolfed up all the Enid Blyton's I could come across. My favorites at the time included "The Faraway tree", "St. Clare's" and "Malory Towers" (sheepish).

Before long I graduated to Hardy Boys, Nancy Drews and The three investigators and I'm not exaggerating when I say I've probably read everyone of them. The next five years saw a lot of variety in my reading. I basically went berserk. I JUST HAD to read ANY printed matter be it classics like Oliver Twist, Vanity Fair, Wuthering Heights, David Copperfield or religious books like the Bible, the Ramayana or the Mahabharatha. There was a time when I was a member of five lending libraries!! I wouldn't go out when my friends called me to play cricket. Books were essential side dishes while eating. The huge pile of books on the dining table irritated my mom to no end. Things went so bad that my Dad was forced to impose a rule that allowed me to read non-academic books only during weekends. I still remember reading under a night lamp until my eyes ached.

Sometime in 7th grade, desperate to keep me away from the stack of James Hadley Chases' we had in our house my Dad introduced me to Erle Stanley Gardner, Alistair Maclean, Desmond Bagley, Jeffery Archer, Robert Ludlum, Dick Francis and Frederick Forsyth. Unfortunately for him however, I'd already managed to sneakily get my hands on a few Sidney Sheldons. In fact Sidney Sheldon contributed more to my sexual education than did my ninth grade biology class or mainstream television. lol.

But all good things must come to an end. Computers have changed my reading habits.. :-(. I still read a lot but nothing like before. This post is getting nostalgic isn't it? Coming back to the questions I'm supposed to answer..

Total number of books I own? It goes without saying that I own enough books to open a small library. Long long ago my sister and I even numbered our books in some complicated x.y.z format hoping to start one. I forget what those variables stood for though.

The last book I read is technically Reader's Digest, but if that doesn't count then it would be "Digital Fortress" by Dan Brown which I read sometime back. And no it wasn't that great. Talking of Dan Brown, I thought "Angels and Demons" was better than "The Da Vinci Code". Both were fast paced no doubt but the former is factually more correct and as a Christian I believe I'm qualified to make that statement.

Books that have significantly influenced me:

1) The Complete Yes Minister and Yes Prime Minister.
- Jonathan Lynn and Antony Jay
I've already talked about this book in my first post. So let me just insert a little something from the book.

Sir Humphrey Appleby: I must express in the strongest possible terms my profound opposition to the newly instituted practice which imposes severe and intolerable restrictions on the ingress and egress of senior members of the hierarchy and will, in all probability, should the current deplorable innovation be perpetuated, precipitate a progressive constriction of the channels of communication, culminating in a condition of organisational atrophy and administrative paralysis which will render effectively impossible the coherent and co-ordinated discharge of the function of government within Her Majesty's United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.
Jim Hacker: You mean you've lost your key?

Everytime I read this, I'm ROTFL.

2) Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
Whoever said this book was for girls. If there was ever a book that could send goosebumps through me then this is it. I read an abridged version of this book when I was on vacation in Madurai during my 5th grade. Over the next 5 years I read the book atleast twenty five times in three other versions. Wonderful dreams I had.. :D. Darcy and Elizabeth.. *sigh*. I've kind of grown out of it now, though it still brings back fond memories.

3) The Three Musketeers and The Count of Monte Cristo - Alexander Dumas
Hail.. Here is D'Artagnan ready to duel with Athos, Porthos and Aramis anytime!! Sword fights rock. Gun fights suck.. :D.

4) The Golden Rendezvous - Alistair Maclean
My father suggested reading him when I was in my 7th standard referring to his english as Queen's english. Rightly so, for Alistair Maclean has taught me more english words than the Barrons. But more than the vocabulary, it is his usage that is most striking. I'm kind of proud of my english but everytime I read one of his books, I'm humbled.
The Golden rendezvous has just about the right amount of romance embedded into the thrilling-as-usual plot which is my main reason for picking it out from all the others.

Other must reads by the same author..
- Fear is the key (An amazing thriller set on an oil rig. The starting is out of the world. Read the first 10 pages and you will be hooked)
- Where eagles dare ( Bluffing at it's very best)
- The Last Frontier (Set in war torn Hungary. A tale of treachery and deception)
- The Guns of Navarone ( A world war II book. Heroism exemplified)
- The Golden Gate ( An audacious kidnapping of the President of the United States on the world famous golden gate bridge in San Francisco. Do read his description of the Golden gate on the first page of chapter 3 (pg 28 in my book). Especially those of you who have been disappointed in love.. lol )
- Goodbye California ( Kidnapping + earthquakes + impending large scale destruction )
- The Satan Bug ( Biochemical warfare )
- Ice Station Zebra ( Set in a submarine deep under the sea ).

5) PG Wodehouses'
Try as I might, I couldn't single out a book by this author. However the entire Blandings Castle series come right at the top.

6) Tintin, Asterix and Archies..
For the innumerable hours of laughter they have provided me over the years, they deserve a mention.

I guess I have rambled on for long enough. Silverine and Prasanna will never make the mistake of tagging me again. :D. Right? Hey.. are you guys still there.. Hey!!?? You asked for it remember?

PS: This day last year, I left India for the US. It's been an eventful year with several ups and downs. Fortunately there have been more 'ups' of late.

PPS: Today also happens to be the 25th wedding anniversary of my parents and both my sister and I are in the United States. That's life for you.. :-(.
Anyway Happy Silver Anniversary Mom and Dad. Thanks for being the 'bestest' parents in the whole world. I love you.. :-)

Cricket Anyone?

2005-08-11T23:22:00.000-05:00

There are times when I wish I was back in India. One of those times is when we guys at UNH get together to play cricket. Now believe me, I don’t have anything against these guys or the game itself. I just have a problem with the concessions we have to make to get a good game going. In my never ending quest for comments I present the game of cricket as played at UNH-Durham,NH,USA in what I perceive to be the most popular format in the blogosphere... the FAQ format. For those of you who are not familiar with the term- FAQs are a set of the 'stupidest' questions that can be asked about a given topic, that beg for a corresponding set of equally stupid answers.

UNH Cricket FAQ...

Q) How is the game of cricket played at UNH different from the traditional game played in India?
A) Are you dumb or what? The answer to that one question would obviate the need to ask any other question and would cover the entire post. Didn't you hear me say that this post is designed to be in the FAQ format? Please reframe your question.

Q) Err.. I suppose there are eleven members in a team like in India?
A) You supposed wrong. There will be a mammoth figure of exactly 3 players in each team. No more no less. It is indeed a temptation to bring in members of the fair sex to join in to make the numbers more attractive but be warned that this could result in a fate worse than death.

Q) How so?
A) Well it's a 10 step process.

1. They(the fair sex of course, in case you were wondering) insist on holding the bat like they hold their teddy bear.
2. You show them how to hold the bat.
3. They ask you why everything must be done your way.
4. You tell them it's not your way but THE way.
5. They want to know why your way is THE way.
6. You tell them that it's your way BECAUSE it's THE way and not vice-versa.
7. They want to know why IT is THE way.
8. You pass out.
9. You come around and see that they are still caressing the bat.
10. You wish you were back home in India watching a mega serial on Sun TV, which you will of course agree is a fate worse than death.

Q) Of course, of course.. My sympathies.. How do you manage to cover the whole ground with just three people?
A) Simple. We don't. We cover one fourth of the ground instead. This has an unfortunate side effect however. The high incompetence level of our batsmen ensures that we end up spending exactly 99.99 % of the total game time collecting the ball from the remaining three fourths of the ground.

Q) Say.. you've changed the number of players and the shape and size of the playing ground? Do you still play cricket with a bat and a ball?
A) Of course you dummy. How else would you play cricket? I'm pleased however that you seem to be getting the hang of this FAQ thing. The questions are getting stupider and stupider..

Q) How is the wicket there? Do people normally opt to bat or bowl?
A) Ah.. the pitch.. the precious 22 yards between the stumps. It's fine... But what does that have to do with your other question about batting and bowling?

Q) I just wanted to know if the wicket there was favorable for batting first or bowling first.
A) Always remember the most strictly followed commandment in UNH, my friend.. The person winning the toss shall always bat first even if God comes down from the heavens and states explicitly that the team batting first will make exactly zero runs.

Q) Are there any differences between the ball you use and the one used in India?
A) Good question. Indeed there is. In India you use a cricket ball. Here however, you would use a tennis ball wrapped in white duct tape to make it look like a cricket ball. Apart from appearance, this modified ball has several additional characteristics that make it special.

1. It is slippery enough to guarantee a minimum of 3 wides in an over. This is invaluable in ensuring that every team puts up a double digit total. The slippery nature of the ball is also the main reason behind the phenomenally high ratio of catches dropped to catches taken.. ie infinity.
2. It allows the bowler to bowl a spweam ball. For the uninitiated, this is a ball that spins, swings and seams at the same time. Spweam balls have resulted in entire games where batsmen have not connected with the ball even once and has caused several long lasting injuries to wicketkeepers who have been foolish enough to try to collect these balls.
3. The softness of the ball guarantees that it goes no further than the length of the bat if at all the batsman does connect with the ball. Note that this makes it extremely difficult to score a run off the bat. Rest assured therefore that all runs scored are wides.

Q) Wow.. is the bat different too?
A) Fortunately not.. Two cricket crazy fools actually bought two heavy bats from half-way across the world. These are the same fools who failed to get their toothbrushes. Maybe they thought they could brush with their bats.

Q) What about the stumps?
A) We have very rigid rules for stumps here. The only permissible stump will be a 3 dimensional trash can about 1.5 metres tall and atleast 10 inches broader than the biggest guy playing in the game.

Q) Why that strange rule?
A) This is the one rule that ensures that no one person stands forever in front of the wicket. It is most critical to the game because the probability of someone getting out by any means other than being bowled is precisely P = 0.0000000000003483. The non-existence of this rule would therefore mean that I would still be on the cricket ground playing last week's match instead of sharing my experiences with you. Don't you dare sigh wistfully now...

Q) I wasn't sighing..(sheepishly).. I remember reading recently that there were eleven ways to dismiss a batsman. Is this true?
A) Indeed it is. I guess we both got it from Niyantha's post where a typical chennai auto driver enlightens him about the eleven possible dismissals.

Q) Why then is that probability figure so high.. err.. i mean low?
A) Ah.. The answer to that question follows logically from my previous rantings. But let me spell it out for your obviously dense mind by taking each of the remaining 10 dismissals in turn..

1. Stumped: I'm sure you will agree that a wicketkeeper who is unable to catch the ball is about as certain of making a stumping as I am of making a million dollars by tomorrow. Add to this what I mentioned of a spweam ball and a wicketkeeper and you will understand why a stumping will never happen.
2. Run-out: Who in his right mind would run in the first place if the ball doesn't go farther than the length of the bat? Btw.. in case you were wondering, the length of a bat is approximately 3 feet or 1 meter.
3. Caught: Does the phrase "ratio of catches dropped" ring a bell?
4. LBW: Who would decide on the LBW? the bowler? the batsman? Or perhaps you are suggesting that we reduce our very large team size of 3 to 2 and dedicate two umpires to make such decisions?
5. Hit-wicket: This dismissal is the reason for the non-zero nature of the above-mentioned probability figure. Note also that the critical rule about the size and shape of the stumps is the reason for the relatively large value of P. With normal sized stumps, hit-wickets would be rarer still and P would be more like.. 0.00000000000000000000111.
6. Handling the ball: The ball evokes such terror among us that we would rather man-handle a modern day chennai girl and risk a possible(inevitable?) cheek-slipper collision.
7. Obstructing the field: With only two members on the field other than the bowler, there doesn't seem much chance of this happening.. does there?
8. Hitting the ball twice: hahahahaha... hahahahaha.. That's right.. join me on the floor and laugh. Connecting once is hard enough.. TWICE?... it wouldn't happen even by mistake.. More rolling.. More laughing..
9. Retired out: You've got to be kidding. These guys wouldn't retire on breaking their leg even if Catherine Zeta Jones or Trisha offered to dress their wound. And no, an offer of a strip show from them wouldn't do the trick either.
10. Timed out: Time out a batsman if you want to take a premature trip to heaven or hell(as is your wont) after being shot on the spot by the player in question. All of us are quite content here on our beloved earth. Thank you.

Phew.. that was a pretty verbose answer.. Hope it was satisfactory.

Q) It was.. Is the ground you play in free always?
A) In the event that it is not, all we have to do is take a trip to the tennis courts.

Q) Is that allowed?
A) Of course it is. Except for a sign that says "Only tennis should be played in these courts" there is nothing that stops us from playing.

Q) But what about the sign?
A) What about it? (puzzled) You ARE Indian aren't you. Since when has it become Indian policy to do as signboards say? We take great pride in our heritage and will not think of doing what our ancestors have never done.

Q) One final question.. Any tips for a newcomer interested in joining you guys for a game of cricket?
A) (Thoughtfully) Well.. it is most important for him to stay put in front of the trash can even if the ball is coming towards a very err.. sensitive part of his anatomy. The ball is not hard enough to do any permanent damage anyway. Also, emphasize the fact that reaching out for a wide ball is a cardinal sin and will be punished with a loud wailing noise from his team mates, that will come back to haunt him for the rest of his life. And yeah.. ask him to beware of the spweam ball.. (chuckling).

The "little" things in life

2005-08-07T00:12:00.000-05:00

One fine day, our gang of five decided to embark on an ambitious project. The grandeur of the project was such that it required planning more intensive than that required by the allies to push past the Berlin wall. Choosing an appropriate location for plan execution was a major task in itself. Geographical implications such as the presence of camouflage, distance from thoroughfare and safety from the elements of nature were to be taken into account. More importantly, a plenitude of necessary resources was key to the success of our venture. After an exhaustive search, an acceptable location was found that fulfilled most, if not all of our requirements. Next came the numerous other constraints that had to be satisfied if we were to meet with even partial success. Discretion had to be ensured if our activities were to be unhindered. Arcane equipment not normally available had to be procured, making certain that the methods of procurement did not draw attention from the general public. Alternative plans had to be devised in case of any unforeseen eventuality. Finally, proper attire was critical to the success of our mission. This was no coat and tie affair but still, the importance of the occasion demanded something special. Keeping in mind all these and several other factors, we devised a strategy. We double checked and triple checked our strategy and after carefully examining our plan of action for any loopholes we picked the D-day.

The big day dawned, and exuding a confidence that would put Tendulkar to shame, we met clandestinely at the predetermined spot to put into action the meticulous plans that had been made over the last two weeks. We were attired in the prescribed clothing and accoutered with the exact instruments and tools outlined by the master plan. The atmosphere was electric. There was no room for complacency. After a meaningful silence and a prayer of sorts we launched our project and proceeded to execute our much hyped plan with the kind of surgical precision that Steffi Graf used to decimate her rivals. Our concentration to the job at hand was total. The focus was on perfection rather than completion. The sweltering heat had no effect whatsoever on our determined young bodies. Brief setbacks did occur, but then our plan was designed to cover every deviation from the norm, which it did.

At long last, after six straight hours of work we completed what we set out to build and stood back to admire our handiwork. A beautiful mud castle stood as a testimonial to our hard work and diligence. It was indeed a piece of art. Symmetrical beyond description, perfectly shaped and majestic in its form the castle stood 2 feet tall and 4 feet wide. I was seven years old then and I’m talking about a castle that was built in our colony in Bangalore after we had read about a sand castle in a comic.

Why all this “build-up” for a mud castle you might ask. Mind you, I might not have known those big words all those years ago but I sure felt the excitement and thrill that those words portray. Building that castle was as important to me as architecting a real house. It may have been a small thing but I was at my happiest when I was doing it, unmindful of the rest of the world and the things happening around me. I miss those little things in life, the things that cost nothing but still bring you unparalleled happiness. If I talk about climbing trees and fences, building paper planes and boats, playing robber and police, reading Enid Blyton, you might want to gently point out to me that I am an adult now and that regrettable though it may be, the days for those childhood activities are long gone. However it is not those activities that I want to draw your attention to.

I am talking of those activities which most of us go through everyday in what we call our “mundane” lives. Let me illustrate with an example. One night I call my friend and ask him how his day was.. He says “Boring da.. I went to work and came back… that’s it.” Huh? Is that really all he did in a 16 hour day? No, he just blanked out what he thought was insignificant. He forgot all about the smile and inquiries of his neighbor when he left for work in the morning. He forgot the call he received after two weeks from his close friend. He forgot about the girl in the coffee shop who told him she liked the wordings on his t-shirt. He forgot the guy who held the door open for him in his office. He forgot the joke his boss shared with him. He forgot that he had had a great lunch. He forgot about the songs he had listened to while working. He forgot feeling the wind in his face when he was taking the train back home. He forgot about the amazing sunset he had seen from that same train. He forgot that he had helped his mom with groceries. He forgot about the book he had relaxed with in the evening. Are these insignificant? Yes, they are. They could happen to everyone everywhere everyday. The key is in attaching significance to them anyway.

If the only things that are going to make you happy are going to a nightclub in a Porsche with a hot girl on your arm, visiting the Empire State building and the Statue of Liberty in New York City, standing on the Golden Gate in California, having ten friends around you to pep you up, getting into the Indian ODI team, cracking CAT, getting straight As in all your courses… well then you’re obviously not going to be happy for most part. If on the other hand you would enjoy an evening out with your parents, a heart-to-heart chat with your mom, an argument with your sibling, a game of scrabble or monopoly, a good book, a walk in the evening with an acquaintance, eating together in the dining hall, dressing up just for fun, sharing a joke, playing a prank, listening to your favorite song a hundred times over… just as much, then you’ve got it made.

It is not easy, however. In my opinion, the best way to appreciate the “little” things, would be to consciously try to remember them and then to generate the enthusiasm to plan for them and make them happen again. My analogy of the castle is intended to pass on the effect of making something totally insignificant into something momentous. The more enthusiasm we generate for even the simplest things, the more they are going to mean to us. Try as I might, I am still unable to generate that castle building enthusiasm for the supposedly mundane events that occur in my life.

I have a theory as to why every passing day makes it harder to appreciate the “little” things in life. But then THAT is another post... :p

Happy Friendship Day!!! :-)

Home away from Home - Part 1

2005-08-02T00:34:00.000-05:00

Those of you who have read the last few comments from the previous post will understand why I just HAVE to talk about “Dorm life” in this post. I said it once before and I will say it again… “Me and my big mouth”. Anyway here goes…

When one thinks of a “Dormitory” one thinks of rows of beds stacked horizontally or vertically. Since I am living in a single room (one of 179 other single rooms in the same building) with just one bed, I guess the term “Residence Hall” might be more appropriate. But then, the word hall itself would seem strange for those unexposed to American universities. After all in Indian terms, isn’t a hall a large indoor space or a living room where you entertain guests? Take it from me that almost every building on a university campus in America is called a hall. If you live in it, its called a residence hall, if you eat in it, its called a dining hall and if you attend classes in it, its called… err.. umm.. just a hall. But I digress. Let me get to the point…

Around 5 pm on the 22^nd of August last year, my first day in the USA, I stood outside Babcock Hall (yup, you guessed right, that’s the name of my residence hall… Do I hear any snickers? I’m a gentle guy by nature, but any puns about the name of my beloved hall and you will see my violent side) looking up at the large imposing five floor brick building. As I walked inside I did not know what to expect. Could I live the same way I had lived before? Could I get along with the diverse population of the building. Would I feel left out or lonely? The last question answered itself almost immediately as I was met near the door by three Indians (girls I may add.. ahem.. ahem). Clearly I was not going to miss Indian girls and that was enough to make my apprehension vanish. Once indoors I was checked in to my room by a blonde girl who smiled at me more than anyone had ever smiled at me in my life. Unsure about what to do, I matched her smile for smile. Just when my mouth was beginning to pain, she handed me the key to 128 and I heaved a sigh of relief. I was now an official Babcock resident.

My first thought on seeing my room… “Kinda small”. But that was probably for the best because I am not capable of maintaining a large and spacious room. Not that I’ve maintained this small room very well. (I can find a way to mess up even a 6ft by 2 ft box if I ever get locked up in one (Don’t get ideas, guys)). It just means that I have much lesser space to pollute which is in the best interest of the universe. The only time my room was very clean was when my initial euphoria at landing in the United States propelled me to neatly unpack my two gargantuan suitcases. That first day my room looked great. I remember beaming at my beautiful room and whistling contentedly. Settling down into a routine however took some time with the kitchens and bathrooms causing me the most trouble.

Whatever little I knew of cooking I had learnt from my Mom hurriedly before I left. I took careful notes and landed here armed with a book filled with recipes for several of my favorite dishes. I would cook with the book in one hand meticulously following one step after another. Imagine a high school chemistry student performing a titration in a lab and you have the exact picture of me cooking. However, I never ever obtained the expected result even if I counted out the fragments of salt. In fact, the net result would be barely eatable leave alone tasty. By the end of a month I had taken a strong dislike to my ‘favorite’ dishes. Now, having used the exactly same ingredients used by my mom, having followed all her instructions to the letter and also having been a good chemistry student (My teacher will testify to this) I concluded that the bad results were no fault of mine. This meant of course that the kitchen was to blame according to the Sherlock Holmes principle which states that “Once all possibilities are exhausted, the last one remaining is true however improbable it sounds.” Having concluded thus, I decided to leave the kitchen alone. If I am alive today to write this post, it is because of two good Samaritans (Anu and Bhagi) who for some reason thought it worth their while to feed me and keep me alive. So if you enjoy reading this even a little bit, please don’t forget to thank them.

The bathroom problem seemed tougher to tackle at first because I obviously cannot give up taking a shower like I gave up cooking. Basically the problem was this. The damned Americans used curtains instead of doors. Didn’t they learn in school that curtains can be “drawn apart”? What I wouldn’t have given for a solid wooden door at that time… (sigh). For the first month I clutched the curtain with one hand while bathing. For the next month I just stood very close to the curtain ready for you know what. After two months passed by without the occurrence of any controversial incident, I finally realized that no one was really interested in peeking at me. It hurt my pride a bit but at least I could now shower in peace.

Having resolved the mundane issues, let us turn to more appealing stuff. The most amazing thing about Babcock is that you can have all the privacy you want and at the same time be among people. Bored in your room? Go to the lounge where a bunch of other people from various parts of the world are sitting around chatting or playing a game. (Babcock is the only international residence hall at UNH btw). Once you are fed up with the yapping around you, you can go back to your room, lock yourself in and put a do not disturb sign outside your door. This sign will keep out people from all nationalities except Indian. Note that Indians will make it a point to knock and ask you why you put up the sign. This problem is easily solved by making sure you write the reason for not wanting to be disturbed on your notice board. Mind you, reasons like “sleeping”, “reading” are simply not good enough. A good reason I’ve found is to say “I’m talking to my parents”. This reason will get you a lot of respect from all Indians alike and they will leave you alone for hours together, praising your goodness. Be careful not to substitute “girlfriend/boyfriend” for “parents” though it seems to logically follow. Extreme jealousy will make them hammer your door down before you even open it.

To be continued……

PS: I was not intending to make this a two part post but it is now 1:30 am and tomorrow is going to be a long day at work. I better hit the sack. Damn you Vidya for that deadline.... :p. Yangbai Gangtok, you should be satisfied now. I’m in the process of keeping my part of the deal. Hopefully someday you will reveal yourself to me so that we can laugh about it.

Over and out... :-)

My ascent into “e-literacy”

2005-07-27T22:31:00.000-05:00

One fine day, when I was in first grade (I guess I was 6-7 yrs old at the time), I told my dad I wanted to be an engineer like him. He then told me about this thing called a “computer”, that he said would change the world. I mulled over this for a moment and asked him if being a “computer engineer” would fetch me Rs 10000 a month (My dad actually earned less than that at that time). When he assured me that it would, I instantly made up my mind that I would be a computer engineer without ever having seen a computer. (sigh.. if only decision making were so simple now)

It was to be several years before I would actually see a computer. Sometime during middle school in fact. My first encounter with a computer is worth mentioning. I remember looking at it with awe and wonder as if it were GOD. I remember touching the keyboard as if one press of the wrong key would obliterate the entire world. I remember sitting very erect and still, as if the slightest vibration would cause the computer to eat me alive. I remember scraping the CPU with my nail and then waiting with my heart in my mouth for my teacher to send me out of the class for defacing that GREAT and POWERFUL machine. (It was a black/white 200 Mhz DOS machine btw.. with no mouse). I remember carefully entering a LOGO program to draw a circle (A one line program) and then chuckling with delight as the cursor moved on the screen feeling as if I had just made a scientific breakthrough of gigantic proportions. I remember my teacher repeating the expansion of BASIC- “Beginners All-purpose Symbolic Instruction Code” over and over again until he had made sure we would remember it long after we were dead. My first encounter was fun no doubt, but more memorable events were to follow.

In my seventh grade, the managing director of my dad’s company invited us for dinner. When we got there, he led me and my sis to his computer. It looked much better than the ones I had seen at school, but more importantly his computer had a mouse and WINDOWS (Windows 95 to be precise) installed. After explaining how to use the mouse, he opened up an encyclopedia and left to entertain my parents. Over the next three hours me and my sister opened, minimized and closed windows on the screen not caring much to read any of the stuff within the windows. (Of course one hour was lost in fighting for our turn for the mouse). It took a hell of a lot of time to close a single window. The “arrow” would head towards the ‘x’ button and then suddenly miss the target. When I missed my sis would let out her most sarcastic laugh and of course I retaliated when it was her turn. Clicking was much worse. We never really mastered the concept of “left clicking” and “right clicking” and were very puzzled when menus popped up. After expounding many theories (each more illogical than the next) to explain the popping up of menus we gave up.

The highlight of the evening was when I heard my Dad yelling for my sis and me when it was time to go home. I was feeling very indebted to our host for letting me use his “personal computer” as he had called it. I very badly wanted to do something to return the favor and decided to save him some power. I looked around carefully and finding the point the computer was connected to, promptly switched it off in spite of my sis telling me to “leave things alone”. Feeling very pleased with myself, I walked into the living room and proudly announced what I had done expecting a pat on the back. What I got instead was a lecture on “shutting down” a system and how a computer was different from a television. Wishing the ground would open up and swallow me, I mumbled my apologies and ran to our car.

Sometime in tenth grade, I came across several articles in the newspapers and magazines about this thing called the “Internet” that was revolutionizing the world. I was highly cynical and found it hard to believe in the concept of accessing information remotely. But very soon a friend took me to a net centre and helped me open my first email account. Seeing is believing and when I started receiving replies to my mails I went gaga over the Internet. From that moment on 75 % of my pocket money was spent on browsing. I went on an email account creating spree and created around a hundred email addresses for myself. Wonder how many of them exist today…. The other side of the Internet was brought to my attention when I was in 11^th grade. I was playing pool with a few friends when one of them said he had something to show us on the Internet. So six of us crowd into a cubicle for one and then I get a shock. My first glance at porn on the Internet. The pictures were more explicit than any I had seen previously in TV/movies. Now, I’m not a prude but I was shivering with fright. I was certain we were all going to go to jail… lol..

It was only in my first year of engineering that I got a PC at home. Then began a period of several crazes. First it was the music downloading craze. I remember spending a month of study holidays most usefully; downloading 227 songs, spending over a 150 hours online to do so. (Today I could have downloaded as much in less than half an hour.) This was followed by the music organizing craze. I created an imposing nested directory structure with more levels than the LIC building in Chennai. I spent hours naming songs, entering track and album information and typing out lyrics. The irony of it all is that I haven’t found time till date to listen to any of the songs. But the worst craze was yet to come. For one semester I ate, slept and played Age of Empires. And did NOTHING else.

In spite of all these crazes I somehow managed to graduate from college finally fulfilling my childhood dream of becoming a “computer engineer”. My entry into America further broadened my horizons what with high speed T1 lines and powerful laptops. Every single day I find something new that I can do with a computer. When I watch DVD quality streaming video or when I talk to my mom and dad on skype, I still feel the same awe that I felt so many years ago when I first set sight on this most remarkable machine called the computer.

Computers of the world… I salute you! :-)

Something 'profound'

2005-07-21T22:20:00.000-05:00

A few of days ago an old school friend of mine calls up and says.. "I read your 'Diwali' post. I'm disappointed. I expected you to write something 'profound'." ('Profound' is in quotes because it was the exact word he used). That upset me a bit because I had thought that post was well written. I told him my intention had been purely to entertain and not to make a point. But his words stuck in my head. So last Saturday I sat thinking of something profound to write. Agonizingly nothing appropriate came to my mind.

It struck me that 'life after death' would be really 'profound', given the fact that no one knows anything at all about the subject. But then I didn't either and having posted only twice until then I most certainly did NOT want to scare people off by talking about bizarre stuff like death. After breaking my head some more, I came to the conclusion that "profound" things were beyond me at that moment and so I went ahead and wrote about my weekend.

A couple of days back however, I had an opportunity to read "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" by Robert T. Kiyosaki. That really started me thinking. Basically what the book says is this: 'EDUCATION IS NOT GOING TO MAKE YOU RICH'. (.. (sob).. My dreams have just been shattered). But the book is right. For those of you, who are thinking you will attain financial freedom through MBAs and Phds, think again. You will not. At the most, education can ensure financial security but not financial freedom. What financial security translates to is- you get all you need but not all you want. Even this is at a cost. Chances are you will end up slogging day in and day out, doing something you don't like (even if you do tell everyone you like it). Financial freedom on the other hand means you get to do what you want and still have the money to spend as you see fit.

Many people are under the impression that an American education/job will ensure financial freedom. I was too. Until I spent some time here that is. Then reality hit me. Let me illustrate by guiding you through the typical lifecycle of a hypothetical Indian landing in the United States. Let's call this Indian, Raj. (Mind you, I have no particular fondness for the name. I picked it for 2 reasons.. 1) It's SRK's name in the much acclaimed DDLJ. I'm just hoping this might generate some interest in my audience and prompt them to read the boring story that follows and 2) It has just 3 letters and is just one syllable)

'Raj' comes to America to do his MS on a full assistantship. Living normally (neither extravagantly nor miserly) he breaks even upon graduation. Soon after, Raj gets a job and starts living it up a bit. He buys a car he fancies and travels around America. Something he was never able to do as a student. Still manages to save around 20000$ each year. After a couple of years he gets bored of being single and decides to get married. Let us assume he marries someone who earns around the same amount as he does. (And no, I'm not going to call her Simren. Lets just call her Ria (I couldn't think of a girl's name with a single syllable)). Expenses should double obviously but in reality they triple. So R&R manage to save 30000$ a year. Together they plan to buy a house. Now a good house in a good location would be anywhere between 300000$ and 500000$. Let's suppose they buy a house for 400000$. Of course this is on a loan at say a phenomenally low interest rate of 5 %. Once they move in they would obviously save all that they were spending on renting a house. They save 60000$ a year now. With that kind of savings it would take them approximately 10 years to pay off that loan (including interest).

In the meantime of course R&R are not idle. They have a couple of kids. Expenses go up like hell. (Parents here have the habit of literally filling their kids' rooms with expensive toys and the increased family count means India trips get more expensive). But both parents are working hard and obviously get pay rises every year. So I'm going to let that rest. By the time the loan on the house is paid off, the children are in the middle of school. It's time R&R started saving for their college education. Now trust me, good undergrad education can be a very costly affair in the United States. And just like Indian parents want their kids to study in the IITs, R&R want their kids to study at Stanford even if it costs an arm and a leg! In numerical terms a four year education at Stanford for two kids would mean R&R would have to save around 400000$ (Assuming 50000 a year per kid). Also, keep in mind that expenses would skyrocket once their children reach adolescence. Boys would require money to take out girls. Girls would require money for perms, facials, manicures etc... Also the legal driving age of 16 in the United States means cars have to be bought and this in turn means doling out for gas. In any case R&R being the typical steadfast and caring Indian parents, manage to save what is necessary when it is time for their children to enter college.

After the kids graduate, R&R are finally able to save a substantial amount. But by this time of course Raj and Ria are 50. They work hard for the next 5-10 years and then retire to spend the rest of their life with whatever they have saved. THE END.

I wonder if I'm going to be like Raj... :-(.. I just hope not..

PS: I just reviewed what I have written and realize that this is a feeble attempt at being ‘profound’ (inspite of all the numbers… lol). I can’t for the life of me imagine why I couldn’t have left out the cracks and stuck to serious sentences. Perhaps it’s because I think life itself is a joke. I really need to grow up…(sigh)

A Happening Saturday..

2005-07-16T22:51:00.000-05:00

Last weekend I was at the International Gem Show in Marlboro, which happens to be around 90 miles(140 kms) from where I live. In case you are wondering what I was doing at a jewel show let me tell you that I was playing driver to a couple of friends(of the opposite sex no doubt) who put their foot down and insisted I take them there. One other guy was also forced (by marital ties) to tag along. I was told to be ready by 9 AM. I blanched. 9 AM on Saturday morning!! Crazy. However, the two prospective jewellery buyers argued that it would get too crowded later in the day and that the best deals and discounts would be in the morning. I was highly cynical (esp about the crowds), but resigned myself to my fate.

So we set off around 9 AM (Indian Standard Time of course) and got there in an hour and a half. There was a 7$ entrance fee and after finding out that we DID NOT get any gemstones free with the entrance ticket my friend and I contemplated catching a movie, leaving the girls to go in and make their own purchases. Almost instantly we decided against it for different reasons. My friend was obviously concerned about the money his wife might splurge. I was however more worried about the time the girls would spend in there. Now don’t mistake me. In my experience girls need someone to tell them.. "oh.. that's awesome".. “it suits you perfectly”.. "wow.. amazing" and stuff like that without which they would go insane with the mammoth decisions that would have to be made. And of course insane people wouldn’t be able to find their way out of a large hall. So it was out of concern for their well being that I shelled out 7 dollars and walked inside.

Almost immediately my jaw dropped open in surprise. There were more jewels in that hall than ALL the jewels given in dowry at ALL the marriages in India. And more importantly there were more people in there than there were during the fourth of July celebrations. In fact I guess it was the largest crowd I had ever seen since I entered the United States. Large crowds always make me feel good because there are hardly any people on the roads here. The crowd was basically full of older people. American teenagers clearly preferred iron, steel and rock to gemstones. In any case if I had wanted to ogle at girls I should’ve gone to the beach. So I moved around observing the vast multitude of people from almost every country in the world occasionally pausing to reassure my female companions that their selections were indeed worthy ones. Only once did the thought of buying something for my sister (yes you suspicious jerks, I said ‘sister’) come into my head and I turned over an especially attractive set of emerald earrings to look at the price tag. Only 506$ after discount. My sister would have to wait! Even bootlicking credit card companies couldn’t make me spend that kind of money on jewels right now.

In the midst of all this I had an urge to use the lone vending machine in the huge hall to buy a can of coke and then proceeded to spill the same all over the floor. I looked around carefully to see if anyone had noticed and then performed a disappearing act. You would be surprised to see how fast I can move sometimes.

Around 12:30 pm, we guys decided that it was time to begin pestering the girls to leave if were to have lunch at atleast 2 pm. Have you ever wondered how girls can get tired and hungry after a short trip from the living room to the bedroom but still walk for miles in malls without thinking of food and rest? Well I have and I’m still wondering. Anyways, after an hour of pitifully moaning about our extreme hunger the girls relented. I must concede though that the morning was not wholly unentertaining.

Lunch was at an Udupi restaurant and among other things, I had “Aloo bonda”. Now this may not be worth mentioning but please note that this was the first time I had ever partaken of the above said dish. Man, was it good. I’ve clearly missed out on some of the better aspects of life in India.

The final stop for the day was at a temple in Framingham. I planned to stay outside but after discovering that I was allowed to keep my socks on (footwear rules are clearly more flexible in the United States), I went in and took a look around. This temple was different from the ones I had seen previously. It wasn’t dedicated to a single God but housed the shrines of several of the most popular Hindu Gods- Shiva, Vishnu, Karthikeya, Lakshmi and Ganesha. There were a couple more but I do not recollect their names. I looked around curiously at the worship going on around me while my friends prayed. Once they were finished we headed home. Our trip back was uneventful barring one particular incident where I very enthusiastically missed the exit we were supposed to take. Not a big deal… just an extra 20 miles before the next one.. lol..

All in all a fun Saturday!

PS: Most of my pals here left for Niagara this weekend. Yours truly did not go. Yours truly is stuck with work...(sigh)..

Out of thin "Smoke"

2005-07-07T23:11:00.000-05:00

I did hint that my next posting would talk about the fireworks display on the fourth of July. The display was magnificent no doubt, but unfortunately green, blue, yellow, pink, purple and all the flashy colors I witnessed three nights ago will still be 'black' words on a 'white' background in my blog. As the visual spectacle reached a climax, the smell of the smoke wafting in reminded me of something else. Strangely enough, smoke smells the same in India and America and my thoughts drifted half the world away to Diwali. In case you are wondering why the display itself didn't bring thoughts of Diwali, let me tell you that I am wondering about that myself. Nevertheless it didn't. Perhaps because it was so different from what I was used to seeing.

Almost invariably Diwali begins the same way for me every year. Around five in the morning I hit the ceiling, bounce a couple of times between the ceiling and my bed and then come to rest on the bed(sometimes on the floor) with a look of shocked bewilderment on my face, not knowing what hit me. Until the next thunderous explosion shakes the very foundations of our house that is. Then realisation sinks in. I curse my neighbors' children who just HAVE to burst "hydrogen", "atom" and the more popular "lakshmi" bombs at such an ungodly hour, curse my neighbors for having such children, curse the world in general and then plug my ears and get back to sleep.

Try to get back to sleep I mean. Let me state here that it is very difficult to sleep while holding your hands to your ears. If you don't believe me, try it sometime. Sleeping on your side would mean sleeping on your elbow (ouch), sleeping on your back would mean either of two things.. 1) Your arms are unsupported. 2) Your arms are stretched out at an unnatural angle of 180 degrees from each other(gymnasts please excuse). And if you don't think that 1) is too big a deal let me remind you about that "raise your hands" punishment everyone of you must have gone through in school. Good, now you get the idea. And of course, sleeping on your stomach would mean immense pressure on your forearms.

After logically considering all three alternatives, I decide to go with the "sleeping on the stomach" option. Soon the ache in my arms becomes unbearable. I sit up deciding to put to good use the brain God has been kind enough to implant in me and give some serious thought to the problem. A pillow catches my eye. Gleefully, I sandwich my head between my two pillows. A wasted effort. It takes less than 2 minutes of continuously modifying the position of my head in between the pillows for me to realise that a hundred pillows would be necessary to effectively muffle out the sound. I considered collecting pillows from all the rooms and the sofas but it took less than 10 seconds for even my "tubelightish" brain to conclude that we DID NOT have a hundred pillows even if I counted the dusty ones lying on the top shelves of our wardrobes.

Totally frustrated, I begin to pace the floor in my room while the nerves in my brain worked overtime to solve what appeared to be an NP hard problem(unsolvable ie). By this time it was 6:30 am and the explosions had reached a crescendo. The early risers had woken up the entire neigborhood which wasn't surprising. What was surprising was that the later risers seemed to think that the best way to punish the early birds for their transgression, was to drown out their noise with more bombs. What foolishness!!! Of course, the incessant noise meant continuous lapses in concentration, ruining any chances of brainstorms. Giving up, I resolve to catch up on my sleep the next day and head out to brush... which is a mistake.

My mom catches me in the hallway. "Nirmal, I'm glad you got up so early.. you need to go to the shop". While I stare at her wondering if I really heard those words.. she goes on.. "There is no milk in the house and I need to make coffee." Fear crept into my eyes. She couldn't possibly be serious could she? I ask her if she knew it was Diwali today. She did of course.. the neighbors had made certain of that. I plead with her but to no avail. I remind her that I'm her only son but she still does not relent. Instead she says "Be a man". That did it. I turn purple with rage. "I'll show her", I think. Another mistake. I shouldn't have fallen for that cheap trick.

Ten minutes later I am at the gate feeling not unlike a soldier about to set foot onto a minefield. I look down the road carefully, trying to chart out a safe route to my destination which was 300 metres away. Being used to running long distances during my school days I would have scoffed at 300 metres on any other day. That day, however the distance seems to be of a much larger magnitude than the distance from Boston to Chennai. I hesitate. The sight of my mom on the balcony propels me. The time had come. I muster all my courage and hurtle down the road. Think of how a dog would run with a triggered string of a 1000 "bijlis"(I forget what they are called) tied to it's tail and you have the exact picture of me hurtling down the road. I zig and zag avoiding both real and imaginary bombs. With my hands over my ears of course. Again, it is not easy to run with your hands on your ears.. especially if there is a shopping bag in one of those hands.. sort of upsets your balance. On top of all that I find that everyone in sight is looking at me as if I were a prize goof. Downright degrading. At long last I reach the store. On my way back I foolishly assume that having reached my destination unscathed it would be safest to take the same route back home. It turns out I was wrong. The net result: I come within 5 feet of an exploding "hydrogen" bomb. I get home in a state of shock, my ears ringing and my eyes staring blankly into space. I look sorrowfully at my Mom and hand her the bag with the milk, expecting a few words of sympathy but I get none. She grabs the bag and walks into the kitchen leaving me gaping after her.

The afternoon is relatively quieter and I am more than content to lie in bed, with a book and some sweets(a more pleasant aspect of Diwali), which some of our neighbors' kids(those over enthusiastic early birds) brought across. (Thank god I was out on my perilous journey to the store when they came over, else I might be languishing in a jail in India for murder right now.) No disturbances at all except for a call from my friend in the evening asking me if I wanted to play cricket. I laugh at him and tell him to go jump in a lake. Inwardly I sighed. It isn't very often that I get a chance to play cricket.

Is this all worth it? Indeed it is. For the sun is about to set.

With sunset comes the best part of Diwali.. the LIGHTS.. The lights may not be as fancy as the display the other night but the sheer numbers more than make up for it. The entire city seems lit up. From my third floor balcony, I see large masses of people on the road and in front of houses lighting up a a variety of firecrackers. Children laugh happily while clutching sparklers or lighting flowerpots(I just love flowerpots). Come to think of it, I'd rather light a small flower pot or a plain rocket myself than just watch a professional set up a massive array of fireworks. While admiring the amazing spectacle before me I realise that I'm still holding my ears to block out the intermittent ruckus. I begin to wonder "If Diwali is the festival of lights, where does the sound fit in?" Of course EVEN I'm not ignorant enough to want soundless firecrackers. I only have a problem with fireworks that produce sound exclusively. Even that would be alright, if the sound were rythmic/melodious/musical. I just do not see the point of lighting up something, then running helter-skelter and waiting fearfully for it to go just... "BAAAMMMM"; which is what I see most people do. Anyway I guess it's a matter of taste. I enjoy the sight for a little bit and make my way inside.

Reflection on the day's happenings: I put up with some noise and get to eat a whole variety of sweets and view a large scale firework display without
1)having to do any "Pooja".
2)having to get up early and bathe.
3)having to go about knocking on doors and distributing sweets.

Not a bad deal at all.

And let me share a secret. I actually missed not being blasted out of bed last year. lol...

One last thing.. Happy Birthday Mom.. I love you.. :-)

On your mark... get stead.. GO.. GO.. GO..

2005-07-04T17:43:00.000-05:00

Thoughts of hitting the blogging scene have been preying on my mind for quite some time now. Every few weeks I would drive the thoughts out of my head telling myself I was too busy to be able to maintain a good blog. (I was not.. Just this feeling of self-importance that invades my being every now and then). In fact I should say my mind was split into two on the issue of blogging. For convenience let's say that the left part of my brain was all for blogging while the right wasn't. (biologists, forgive this trivialization). Since last year my left mind(LM) has been playing various tricks on my right mind(RM)(assuming again that RM had the final say in the matter) to get me started with blogging but RM was STRONG. RM resisted with all his might each of the arguments put forward by LM. A most persuasive train of thought that LM tried follows..

LM: isn't that blog good? I could do much better..
RM: Oh really? I don't think so.
LM: Umm.. I could atleast do as well
RM: do you really think so?
LM: Actually "NO"
RM: I knew it..
LM(consolingly): But I could come close
RM: seriously?
LM(sheepishly): again No.
RM: sigh
LM: But atleast a blog would be a more productive way of wasting time than hanging out with girls.
RM: Hah! Are you trying to put one over me? I know my priorities in life.
LM: Oops.. my mistake..

and so it went.

Until today, that is. I got back from India last week. And LM has been acting up since I got here. Anyways I figure 15 months of procrastination has beaten all my previous records and so am on the verge of taking the plunge. In fact since I've already typed out 250 words(don't count, it was just an estimate) I guess I should say "I've taken the plunge". :-)

Why today the fourth of july 2005? Today is not my girlfriend's birthday (but then again it might be.. Sadly I won't know for sure until I meet her). However today just happens to be the "FOURTH OF JULY" which is why I must explicitly state before I am branded a traitor, deserter and the like that the American Independence day is NOT the inspiration for beginning my blog. It just happens to be a long weekend during which I took the time to get started. In fact if at all something(or rather someone) has inspired me it would be Vinod(my junior in college) for he maintains one of the classiest blogs I have come across.

I would like a theme to my blog. Having lived in the United states for about a year now and having been born and brought up in India, a comparison of the two cultures seems to be the most obvious theme. I would like to state here that my opinions/postings may be controversial. However, the intention is not to ridicule either of the cultures but to share my thoughts and have a little fun at the same time. That being said, I reserve the right to digress and talk about myself at anytime.. ;-).

A little something about me..
I am pursuing graduate study in Computer Science at the University of New Hampshire which happens to be a quiet and picturesque school about an hour from Boston. I studied Information Technology at Sai Ram Engg College and was lucky enough to fall under the scope of Madras university since that meant I didn't have to study for four years.. Don't be envious.. I've had to slog my heart out during the last one year making up for my lack of "knowledge", and I've still got a long way to go.

Reading is a passion of mine.. and I will very definitely explore the subject further in my future postings. I love satirical humor and my favorite books in that category are "Yes Minister" and "Yes Prime Minister". I would certainly recommend that everyone read the book (note that I said 'read' not 'watch'). More specifically I would recommend it to the fans of "The Hitchiker's guide to the galaxy". Having read both books I'm confident they will appreciate it.. for the nonsensical humor if nothing else..

I ought to get going now and watch the wonderful fireworks display that my friends are raving about. If it lives up to expectations it might even make an ideal next posting.

God Bless America.. and India.. and every other country in the world.. :-)